W gets mad at me for everything. I've spent years doing my best to avoid things that would make her mad but it was impossible.

This time she is mad at me for spending too much money. Had to do some work on my car and she makes it sound like I'm gonna cause her Electric to get shut off and the kids to starve.

Untill recently, I've been trying to get by on an allowance from her. A little while back, I started taking money from my pay before she got total control of it so I could make sure I can get to work and eat.

Loosing control of how much money I have must be killing her because now she's mad at me all the time again.

Since we seperated, almost a year ago, I have been spending all my time with the kids at our house. She was always there also. Now she says she doesn't want to do that anymore.

I'm not gonna change the way things have been untill I have my own place to take the kids(Still living with relative) So I told her she didn't have to stay while I'm there. She has been saying for months that she could go stay with her parents when I'm there but she hasn't actually done it yet.

She also blames me for her not being able to stay at her parents. She says that I don't let her leave the house without taking the kids with her.

I wish she would just leave when I'm there so I don't have to worry about her being mad at me for something.

I'm realy getting tired of all these "fantasy life" games of hers.

I'm tired of someone being mad at me all the time

And I'm tired of it bothering me that she is mad at me.

I guess I'm just plain old tired

WIWH

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I wish she would just leave when I'm there so I don't have to worry about her being mad at me for something.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">So tell her that. Use your voice. It's still your house, and you need quality time with your kids. She will have to leave. She hasn't given you many other options.

Why don't you take all the money and get a place and have the kids at your place?

Okay, I know all the reasons you can't just do that. Wish, you may want to counter-file. This is ridiculous.

Wish, I know just how you feel. I walked on eggshells with my wife for years. Every time I came home it was like walking thru a minefield. I'd do anything not to make her mad. Many times I ate it and made admissions that I was wrong 'just to keep the peace'. With her everything had to be her way or the roof got blown off.

This probably would have continued till 'death do we part' if it hadn't been for her A. This separation has given me time and space to realize what was lacking in our relationship. It allowed the (hehehe) 'fog' to lift from my eyes and evaluate realistically our relationship and how it had degraded over the years. Now I just won't put up with it. She can get mad all she want's and I'll just keep on keeping on.

Thank you all

Newly,

I'm gonna try. But it's hard for me to be anything but nice to her. At the very least I can let her get a small taste of what it feels like to be asked to leave your home without your family.

I also want her to know that I don't want her around anymore than she wants to be there. I have always done my best to make her happy and comfortable but guess what. "Get out of my face, you turn my stomach and I can't take it any more."(Boy I wish I could talk to her like that)

GG,
If I didn't think I would end up in Jail, I would just take my money and kids and say goodby to her. I could never do that to the kids though.

The funny thing is I have been thinking of filing myself lately and it is sounding like a better idea everyday. The end of this month will be a year that I am out of the house and as some of you know, not a darn thing has changed. I just want it all to be over so I can be me again.

We are trying to set another mediator appointment so I'll see how that turns out first.If it goes nowhere, I'm going to the lawyers to get things moving.

I may loose more that way but it's only money. She already took everything from me that I want.

Harry,
I too know how you feel. It took me a long time to see what I was stuck in and settled for. In fact I started a thread not too long ago about the BS fog that some of us were in, thinking we were in a good relationship.

I hope one day that all like us find what a real loving relationsip feels like.

Full Steam Ahead, No turning Back, No Regrets

WIWH