Had a little R talk with WW. Some went OK. But not the end, Had to walk away before LBing, and DJ's started on my part.

Talked some about the DV. Don't even know how to go about describing this...

WW told me she spent 13 years at home nurturing and caring for our children while I went out and provided. (sometimes working three jobs)

We were talking settlement issues, mostly she was. She wanted to know why I thought I should get the house. I told her. We bought the house a few months after we married. I provided the entire down payment. More than $10,000. When we married she literally came with only the clothes on her back. She was driving my second car because she didn't have one. I'm not upset with this mind you, I was in love and planned on spending the rest of my life with her. Of course that has changed now.

She tells me that none of that matters and a judge won't care, and she doesn't care. I informed her that I do care. Though not necessarily about the money.

She tells me that she stayed at home with the kids and that it should stay the way "she is accustomed too". I told her that didn't seem fair, that she keeps her lifestyle while I pay for it. She claims that is the way it was and it shouldn't change. Somehow this makes sense to her.

Am I loosing my cookies here?

I told her I'm just supposed to work? And she says, yes that is the way it was.

I'm a little at a loss, am I supposed to keep her in the lifestyle she was accustomed to, while my own lifestyle becomes one of a servant/slave with nothing in my life to which I've become accustomed? She says that is Florida Law, that is the way it is supposed to be.

She is the one who is having the affair, and choosing to tear apart our family. I will always make sure the kids are taken care of, that is always what I did. I don't understand why I have an obligation to support her affair financially when I get no benefits of a homemaker.

I know I didn't do justice to our conversation. It was just so strange listening to these words come out of my formally loving Wifes lips.

Tom

Fogman and I are just starting the D stuff, too. He doesn't want a D (the ultimate Cake-Man) so wavers from giving me everything to getting the kids himself (never gonna happen).

It's so eerie to be talking this way to my WH that I have known since birth. He denies the A now, told me he would lie to the judge about it, spouting off something about defamation of character. OK, whatever, dude!

Today, we signed the selling contract with our realtor and will be listing our house in 2 weeks. Soooooo weird. I love this house. I'm gonna miss it, but I need to move on and be closer to family now.

Florida may be different, but your contribution to the downpayment should be taken into account. You've gotten a lawyer, correct?

My WH wants me to suddenly work full-time after 3 years of 3/4-time since 2nd son was born. I'm not sure what he's getting at, but he is complaining already about child support and I haven't even filed yet! That makes me nervous.

Just see what happens, and don't believe a word she says, Tom, until you talk with your L. Fogtalk also applies to divorce proceedings, not just the A. I found that out fast!

I don't know the legal issues, but I don't see that she should be able to just stay home as if nothing had changed.

I had been an at home mom for most of the 12 years of our marriage; however when we divorced I got a job working 8 to 1, M-F as I had sole custody and wanted to be available for the kids.

Your wife may not be able to work full time depending on the ages of the kids and how much she is needed at home; but I do think she should provide some of the income.

In my state, I only got child support, no alimony, and didn't have the choice not to work.