My story is incredibly long...however, my husband has a sex addiction, he is verbally and recently has become somewhat physically abusive. He's never punched me but he has shoved me, held me down, sat on top of me, etc.

I left one time before and foolishly believed all his promises to change,etc. That lasted about a month after I returned home.

I've told him twice in the past couple of weeks that I want a divorce. He will not discuss anything. We own two homes together, cars, debts, but no children. I'd like to sell both houses and go from there but he will not discuss one thing. As soon as I bring up divorce and/or separation he gets very angry - tries to turn the tables - reclaims how sorry he is, blah blah blah. This goes on and on. It's almost like a game to him - or so it seems.

I've tried reasoning however there's none of that with an addict. He's had more women than I can count along with porn and he feels that just because he's not actively having an affair right now I shouldn't leave him. That's not the point anymore...there is no recovery. He refuses to seek any counseling, etc. This has gone on since d-day almost two years ago.

My spirit is dead. I no longer want to try with him. God has released me and I want the peace that awaits me.

Anyway, I've thought about just filing myself and letting the courts decide for us as he won't dicsuss anything. The thought of having the sheriff serve him while I still live here is unbearable as he'll flip out. The thought of leaving again and having him hunt me like a wild animal scares me.

I've talked to the domestic violence shelter and they have given me a lot of information on injunctions, etc however she warned me that he can still follow me, he can try to get me away from work and/or home.

Maybe I am worried for nothing...just my past with him and recently his behavior is causing me to worry.

I'm in FL where it's no fault and 50/50. So....I could do it myself and hope the judge will tell us what to do.

I worry about my credit being tied to him, I worry that he won't make house payments even if one of the homes is given to him in the divorce, etc...

Anyway, sorry for the rambling..thoughts anyone?

Angelia

Talk to a lawyer, there are many things you'll need to know.
And judges don't decide who gets what. They will do everything to get the people to decide - which only drags it out longer.
Use the local women's crisis center for counseling, they've seen it all.
And, there are many great books on divorce. Get to the library or bookstore and formulate a plan.
A divorce is just not financial, the emotional side is the hardest to take.

Hey lady!

I would prefer to email my thoughts to you. Do you still have the same address?

((((((Angelia))))))

Love ya!
K

yes ma'am!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I've told him twice in the past couple of weeks that I want a divorce. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">So what do you expect him to do, unless you are using the statement as a threat? Agree with you? do the dirty work?

If that is truly what you want, and if you don't have children, you converse around with friends, and find the best lawyer you can, and you consult with him, alone, without your H's knowledge.

You make a plan, you anticipate his reactions, and your get all set with the lawyer. . . then you follow through on the plan.

I really don't understand what you think you are going to accomplish by telling him you want one. . . other than to stir up emotions and drama.

wiftty