Hi! It is almost midnight here, and I am feeling desperate to talk to someone. My h and I have been married for a little over 3 years now. I am 22 and he is 23. We are highschool sweethearts. I love him so very much, and I know he loves me. The problem is that I am a horrible person.<p>You see, my h is very good to me-anyone will tell you that. I know that. But, I am not a good wife. I nag, constantly complain, and have a temper that is ridiculous. I am also addicted to a message board (not sexual or anything; it is a frugal website) on the internet. I know that I am addicted because I am irritable if I haven't logged on and posted there every day-hours a day.<p>These last 2 days have been nothing but us arguing. Mostly, because of my temper. I got mad at him today, because he asked me a simple question, that I didn't want to ask. Why do I get that angry??? He told me a few minutes ago that he had thoughts of leaving me. I love him-I don't want to lose him, so why do I treat him so horribly? Can someone please give me some insight. He is everything to me, and he deserves so much more, so much better.<p>Thanks, so sorry that this was so long.

Welcome to MB. I'm fairly new her myself. I'm sorry to meet like this. You will probably hear from some wisers MB'ers. What I can do is pass on some wise wisdom that was given to me. There are some very good books out written by Dr. Harley. Look in the bookstore link. One of them is His needs/her needs. Also, look at some of the links on this website, this may also help, I don't recall what they are at this time.<p> Have you considered counseling for yourself to help with your anger. My H always said I was angry, which I denied. Just recently I realized I was angry. Once I identified the source of my anger, I was able to deal with my H in a much nicer way. <p>
Good luck to you.

Hello and welcome,
First things first,i see it as your husband is feeling a bit on the back burner,so to speak.
Just step out of yourself and go over your actions and play them back in your head..now you know that isnt what you want hun..if you love him as you say,sit him down and talk to him,tell him anything and everything that is bothering you,dont LB,just be honest,and be open to anything he says or asks. marriage is hard,for i am a BS,in recovery,and i pushed my wife away,and the affair happened, so see it as this,when your husband finds that woman that will listen to him and not nag..etc...which is only fog!! not real life stuff if ya know what i mean. He will jump on it as soon as he can... So just change you attitude day by day...its hard but soon it will come natural...maybe you could secretly get a hotel room with a hot tub and suprise the poop out of him..and then you two can talk and be in a peaceful atmosphere,not like at home..ya know..anyways...i sure hope you think of how your pushing your husband,that you love,into anothers arms....just relax and evaluate your life.. hope i wasnt to blunt..but hun, if he is good to you and your family and you know he truly loves you...why push him away.?
take care and please feel free to post anything you need or want too.....k?

Have you gone through all the links on the general information page? There is quite a bit of info on all topics such as His Needs/Her needs, questionairres to download, articles etc.<p>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=29&t=000553

The symptoms you describe sound like me when I haven't had my anti-depressants. Have you talked to your doctor about medication? Clinical depression symptoms include irritability and isolation.<p>You might also think about individual counseling. You are going to have to get 'right' with yourself before you can fix the marriage.