She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the ex-husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air resheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which time they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit... Repairmen refused to work in the house...The maid quit...

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back...

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...But only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She greed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home... including the curtain rods.


I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU????


Just thought y'all might need to smile!


CJ

<small>[ September 09, 2004, 09:38 PM: Message edited by: FaithfulNewCJ ]</small>

That was great, CJ, I am laughing so hard!!

Boy CJ,

That was just a plain nasty story. I went the simpler route. I let him have her. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Oh, wait, I was nasty too. Bet Brian [OM] is loving life about now too.

Never mind. My bad...

CJ,

That was the perfect story for me right now as I've spent the last week packing and moving my stuff into storage so that my STBX can come and get the things he wants, that I've taken care of for him for the last 3.6 years for him, tomorrow.

I'm glad it's that much closer to being over. Today was the day I finally went through the old letters and pictures, something I'd put off until last. It was hard. There were frequent reminders of better days with my H and of my stepson (who died by suicide 6/13/04 at the age of 23) as a sweet, innocent boy as well as during his more troubled adolescence.

Last week after court (my H stayed out in the parking lot), my H's attorney described my H's relationship with the MOW as "sad and dysfunctional" because she's "so weak" and he "dominates her." Charming. Who needs dead fish when they've got each other...

CJ - this is SOOOO good. I'm gonna have to remember this!!!

Hugs,

Jan

I love that story...thank you for the laugh...I needed it tonight. Pat