My thoughts and prayers will be with you, Java.

Wow, the response is a bit underwealming <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Not to knock gettingthere, thank you.

TB

Java, I'll be praying for you.

Java - I'll pray for you. I know what it is like to deal with an x who has trouble dealing with you. I will confess that both my x and I still seem to have some anger toward each other. I've decided that there is a lot of pain inside all of us.

You've come a long way. A really long way. And it's nice to know that you are doing well.

Your daughter is lucky to have a father who wants to see her just as my children are lucky to have a father who wants to see them. Because I know that so many children are not so lucky, I try to tell my children how glad I am that their father wants to be involved in their lives. I hope your daughter's mom can reach that point.

Personally, I found going to court to be one of the toughest things I ever did - and I did it alone. But it was one of the most liberating things I ever did. I fought long and hard for my marriage for over 3 years. But, you can't make the blind see.

I hope you will feel God with you. His love around you. And that, when the battle is over, you know in your heart that you fought a good fight. You could only do all you could do. But you can't make anyone else do anything in cases like these.

If you are ordered to talk with her, please be respectful of both your stbx and yourself. You are a man of worth and you are loved by the Father.

He will be with you. And He will talk with you anytime you approach Him.

Java,

I'll be praying too. I think I may take a rather different approach though...I'm going to pray that God work a mighty work IN YOU, so that you experience His peace tomorrow.

JSC, I know there are days when you have struggles of faith and it feels like God isn't listening, but tomorrow, I pray that the one in that courtroom being healing and brought to fullness is YOU. God has promised He will look after your STBX, and He is faithful, so I'm just going to believe Him...but one of the real miracles tomorrow CAN be a miracle IN YOU!!

I'll call you tomorrow just to touch base and give you a little encouragement, k??

Your true and faithful friend,


CJ

My prayers too, Java.

Btw, I wasn't going to post until I saw your response that indicates that you think people aren't praying for you because they're not posting that they are.

It's been my experience that many, many, many, people pray but don't necessarily post back that they are. One time, I requested emergency continuous prayers and I think 1 or 2 people replied. But, here in my house, it was FELT by all of us--including the one who was in a dangerous crisis and no longer believes in God.

We're really not alone, Java <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Take care

May God bless you and your family.
Let us know how it goes.

We came to an agreement today, we'll be divorced by year end.

I don't want to fight, if she wants to go, then she can go.

She gets her portion of the debt, I get time with YD. Neither of us gets as much as we want, but I think we both want it over.

So I'll be free in less than 21 days, give or take.

TB

Java,

I'm sorry it's over, but don't sell yourself short. You won't be free--just inexpensive. (Trying to inject some humor into a sad day.) How are YOU doing?? Naturally I care for your WW and hope that she will come to her senses, but I'm more worried about my friend. Are you doing okay with this agreement today, or is every fiber of your being screaming "NO!!"???


CJ

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by FaithfulNewCJ:
<strong> Java,

I'm sorry it's over, but don't sell yourself short. You won't be free--just inexpensive. (Trying to inject some humor into a sad day.) How are YOU doing?? Naturally I care for your WW and hope that she will come to her senses, but I'm more worried about my friend. Are you doing okay with this agreement today, or is every fiber of your being screaming "NO!!"???


CJ </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">CJ,

I am very ok, but how are YOU today. Wow, my life is cake compared to your drama. (I've not checked in with the latest on your thread, so I don't know.)

WW and I got into an argument last Tuesday about the pickup, and she started screaming get out (of her apartment) and I started backing to the door. She was telling me how she could (not would) keep YD from me, and I was asking her if that is what she meant to say, etc. I stopped in the door to answer this question, and she would have hit me with the door had I not had my foot where it was. So here's the scene, I'm asking for clarification, she's screaming, trying to push me and push the door. YD grabs WW by the leg and WW (I'm sure accidentally) pushes YD down. So I point out to WW how she's behaving and what she just did to YD, when WW smacked me in the face.

SD came up from the computer and started screaming, "Get out of our F'ing house."

So I left, WW called the cops, I was already on the way there to report it as well.

I don't need this sort of drama anymore, and I just have to pray that this was just her losing it even more. I was very calm, no yelling, no sarcasm, etc.

So I do have to say I've had some more peace in the past week, and was very thankful to God that I did hold my temper. (I really wasn't even mad, perhaps disappointed.) I'm glad that I've become more mellow in the past year.

The way things go in this county, unless the woman is an axe murderer (and even axe murderers with a note from their mother get custody) she will get custody anyway and my attorney advised against me fighting based on the judicial bias here.

So WW agreed to a percentage of the debt that I could live with, first right of refusal, one night / week and EOW, etc. She pays her own legal fees, I pay for Camy's and my name change. (Yes, I'm changing my name after the divorce, but my initials will stay the same.)

And it will probably be signed, sealed and delivered by year end.

Let the OM have the drama, I'm done <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

TB

You have my prayers. I am sorry. But you deserve to be freed from this burden.

I pray for peace for you tonight.

Java-

I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. I pray for peace for you and your daughter as you begin this new phase of your life.

Take care and God bless!
K

take a witness with you,
pickups at a public place,
video tape if necessary from a distance

Tony, get a grip on reality,
she does not have your reality, you are now dealing with the dark side of life. ..

treat her as such. . . treat her with fear of potential legal intervention just because she can make it so with her reality. . . regardless of how you look at religion and all that other stuff, you need to figure out how to protect yourself (keep the distant and learn where she wants to play dirty to create legal land mines for you to step on.)

wake up and smell emotionally disturbed WW. not the person that she presented to you. . . could be age triggered latent disorder or mental illness, which is most likely the cause. . .

got to protect yourself or you won't get to see ANY part of your daughter. . . also, you are seeing what happens with brainwashing. . . and FOO issues, as these behaviors can be passed down to generations as with step daughter. . .

and i bet that she drove off the SD father in a similar manner. . . take one of her siblings with you, if any of them are still on speaking terms with you, to get them to see that she needs help. . .

treat your interactions with her like she is a jeykell/hyde situation. take her as a whacko threat to your daughter, and just work on your daughter. . . protect your image by not letting her destroy your image with her behaviors where there are no other witnesses, which if she suceeds, will be damaging forever.

TONY, i have talked to you before, she is not an ordinary woman that you ask about on here. get that through your mind and operate accordingly.

wiftty

nieve and innocent and unassuming are now no longer a defense in here or in court. . .
because a good lawyer can argue both sides, and argue that good intentions have ulterior motivations. ..

start playing defense and smart. . . you have no other alternative or give up your daughter entirely.

wiftty

Hang tough. Prayers...Prayers for you and your attorney to handle this thing well.