OK here is the probllem many know my story already....my husband jumped into a relationship pretty damn fast on his own when HE decided that our marriage was over....well he was here for visitation tonight....and he has never called to make plans to spend time other than usual visitation....he asked if he could take DS for an hour or two and go christmas shopping.....I asked will it be just you two....he said no....I said I would like it to be just you two...it's not the appropriate time to introduce your girlfriend to him....and he got argumentative and said when will it be I said we can maybe do a gradual transition after the divorce is final....but during the divorce it's not the time for it....and he won't budge....and he is still holding the you filed for full custody so your taking my son away from me bit....I said no we can work out a schedule...he said no....now he is saying I have to show him proof that the experts say you should wait at least 6 months to introduce a person/interest into a child of divorces life.......can anyone help? Any books to reference....

Hi
I had a similar situation shortly after I filed for divorce. I noticed a change in one of my daughters..lashing out after being with dad etc..and after a couple weeks she 'finally' told me what was bothering her. Apparently 'dad' was taking the kids out to dinner on weekends and meeting the girlfriend there, and this was making the kids very uncomfortable! I brought this up with my lawyer, and the judge ordered that 'neither' one of us was to have the children around a 'paramour' until after the divorce was final. I don't know if every state is the same, or if that was the judges choice..this is in NJ. You didn't mention how old the child is......

http://www.co.washtenaw.mi.us/DEPTS/courts/foc/smile.htm

Hi again....under 'How Parents Can Help Their Children'....suggests not to rush into the introduction....

Nancy,

That link is a great resourse. I had to attend it, and it was an eye opener. I think it should be expanded to a national program.

thanks guys I don't know if ut will be enough he wants something that says 6 months and it should be by a liscensed induvidual...knowing wh he will read it upside down and bacwards trying to find some smidge helping him out

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by missinghimterribly:
<strong> now he is saying I have to show him proof that the experts say you should wait at least 6 months to introduce a person/interest into a child of divorces life.......can anyone help? Any books to reference.... </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Helping Kids cope the sandcastles way
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0812929020/102-6150372-2188136

In here they say to wait a year at minimum before introducing new love interests.

I feel for you I had a battle with WW about introducing the OM. Thankfully I won! Hope you win too!

Miker