I am asked a lot why did i decide to leave my husband. Some of the reasons really make me look like a fool.Which i was to continue. We have always struggled financially. In the past 2 years it has been compounded by emotional affairs online( both of us) Now that I look back and really see what was happinng. I really feel stupid.I am confident that I know what i have to do now and get this mess of a life cleaned up.I guess i just need to hear that we all make mistakes and not see things for what they really are until it is to late. Everything in my life has changed and been lost except my children. Actually I feel better for the times being. I worry about him, I do not hate him. I just cant live like that anymore and he is not going to change permantly ever experiance has showed me that.

Hi Passion,

I don't know your situation, so I can't say much about how you feel. But sometimes, a relationship changes and you can't do anything about it. My STBXH is undiagnosed bi-polar with spending and internet compulsions. Was he this way when we married 25 years ago? No. Do I have to divorce him now? Yes. There's an OW and he's mentally in la-la land and spending money like water. I have to divorce him to protect the family.

You sound as if you regret your actions. Do you think it's worth it to try to work things out with your husband or do you think you're better off without him? I will tell you that, even though my H abandoned us with no warning, I called him to apologize for transgressions I felt I had made. I did it knowing the OW was there. There was no ulterior motive but to leave a clean slate.

Good luck and be easy on yourself. This is hard enough for you as it is without you being your own worst critic.