Hi,
My d-day was 2 weeks ago. I posted once last week. My WH moved out 7 months ago to have space to work on his issues- and he got a girlfriend a few weeks later and proceeded to lie about it since, even taking our kids to her house out of state several times. He moved in with OW last Monday (2 states away.)

I *know* that this is the beginning of a better life, but why can't I kill the hope yet that he may actually want to be part of it?

I am working on making amends for what I did wrong in our marriage- stuff I have to do anyway. I guess I am also mourning the fact that I don't have a chance to work with my best friend to repair our relationship- he just decided that his life was better without me as his wife and he would be a better father 2 states away from his kids.

Of course then, I just hope he is the fog speaking, but even that doesn't make the hurt from all the lies and disregard for our welfare go away. I still have so far to go.....sigh

Kath
M - 8 years
S - 7months
me 29
WH 32
PA- 6 months (he moved in with OW last Monday)
D-day 2 weeks ago
4 kids 7,6,3,1

I am very sorry for your situation...
My prayers are with you

I can truly feel for you, and some of what you may be going thru. My WH never did confess to his affair....and we are now separated, and I just found out that he and the 25 yr old girl ( he will be 49 next month, I am 47), are going on vacation to Florida together tomorrow. Even tho, there are many things that I do know he did to undermine our marriage, I tried to confess my own faults to him. I wanted, like yourself to make ammends for anything that I had done to bring us down. But no matter what you may have done....your husband , like mine, is to blame for the choices that he has made. We can choose to work things out...or not. And, we can not make someone else do the things we wish they would. I can only hope the words of others on this board are true, and that we will all be stronger one day. And we will get thru this in one piece.
take care of yourself.....
thtech

I can promised one thing with the help of the Lord. My wife suddenly left me after 27 years of marriage. We have 8 children, 7 grandchilden and we were a well respected couple around the church circle. God told me to love her as Christ loves the church. When she filed for divorce and I ran out of ways to delay it, I was simply crushed for at least 3 years during the divorce process. It was truly only by the grace of God that I was able to sustain my sanitity. By reading the Word of God and staying in the presence of God with counseling, I now can look at her, just like she has never been married to me. I pray daily that she will turn her life back over the Lord. Please remember that only God can repair a broken heart. This is reguardless to who did the damage. May God's Love cover your hurts and pains.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Eldertb:
<strong> I can promised one thing with the help of the Lord. My wife suddenly left me after 27 years of marriage. We have 8 children, 7 grandchilden and we were a well respected couple around the church circle. God told me to love her as Christ loves the church. When she filed for divorce and I ran out of ways to delay it, I was simply crushed for at least 3 years during the divorce process. It was truly only by the grace of God that I was able to sustain my sanitity. By reading the Word of God and staying in the presence of God with counseling, I now can look at her, just like she has never been married to me. I pray daily that she will turn her life back over the Lord. Please remember that only God can repair a broken heart. This is reguardless to who did the damage. May God's Love cover your hurts and pains. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I just want to completely affirm the wonderful words you have shared here Eldertb!

I wasn't married as long as you. 10 in my case. But as the Lay Pastoral leader of my church I can also feel exactly what pain you are talking of to have your dear wife leave. The pain & devastation are second to none. It is no wonder that our God says He "hates divorce"!! He Himself IS divorced!!! By His former #1 created being Lucifer turned Satan. By 1/3rd of the fallen angels in Heaven. Now by multiple billions of those made in His image here on Earth who choose to slap His face and say "no" to an eternally wonderful life with Him.

My 2 dear sons (15 & 13) just pray every day that my WW will give her heart back to Jesus some day so she can be in Heaven. That's all we can do. God, in purest love, cannot force a single person against their choice.

Nevertheless, He knows how to bind up our wounded broken hearts and give us purpose and direction again. For He Himself has lived through our pain! He understands our path through suffering.

High Flight