My wife has been attending University for the last year to study a ‘Counselling’ course, Person Centred to be exact. During this time she has totally changed and no longer speaks to me in ‘English’. All our personal talk is now in counselling riddles or every time she speaks I am asked to confirm what she as just said like a school child. Her latest topic is I have to come with a business plan for our relationship and I have no idea where to start. Does anyone have any ideas on how I can go about this? I have a degree in mathematics but I find words very very hard as I think in formulae or pictures but not words. I am also 30% dyslexic, which does not help when it comes to putting my thoughts down. Any help would be appreciated?

David_david

I am a college professor and I have never heard of something called a business plan for your marriage and she talks to you in riddles? She clearly is off the deep end. I think you need to stand up to her and tell her to stop this foolishness and talk to you at a mature level in plain English. I would strongly suggest counseling immediately for the both of you in order to save your marriage. It is doubtful that anyone would accept a relationship where the spouse talks to you like a child and in riddles.
I am afraid she will only get worse down the line if you accept this nonsense. I wish you luck.

David,

It appears that your wife has jumped into her counseling course with both feet and is trying her assignments out on you. In her defense at least she is willing to try something new. In your defense, you shouldn't be made to feel like a "lab rat" in your own home.

With that said, I think your wife MAY be trying to get a handle on what you envision for your future together; goals, hopes, dreams, etc. Since your are visually oriented, try to communicate what you "see" when you look into the future -- maybe even tear some pictures out of magazines to help illustrate your thoughts.

Some questions you might want to address:

Do you envision your life with just you and your wife? What about children? How many? Do you want to have your own children? What about adoption? Foster children?

Do you plan to retire early? Work your whole life? Change careers? What about travel?

Where do you want to live? Where you are now? Someplace different? Buy an RV and drive across the country until you find where you want to live?

Do you think about what you want your life to be like 10, 15, 25 years down the road? If not, what do you envision for the next 3-5 years? Do you have any dreams for the immediate future, such as a promotion at work? Cruise to Alaska? New roof for the house?

You get the idea. Just some thoughts...

Thanks for your advice. I am new to this site so I missed a few important details.

Married 20 years
2 kids