Hi Everyone,

I have recently heard thru the grapevine that OW is about to receive over a Million for her silicone boob suit with Bristol Myers on a technicality where the judge presiding had flubbed.

Interesting enough, right on the heels of that announcement, OW and my ex-H are planning to wed this Feb 14th - 10 days away. They've been engaged for over 3 years. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I was surprised on two counts, one being my ex-H is actually marrying this unstable person (this is the woman who harrassed me during my cancer treatments) and two that the idea they are marrying bothers me. I cried.

I in no way want my ex-H back, I'm just hurt that it's her he is marrying - typical theme on this board.

I'm also bothered because this woman has scammed the government and all it's available benefits for years for a way of life - using having illegitimate children (4) with married men to further her welfare and then once that was no longer available, pretending to be deathly sick from her elective boob installation to collect disability yet not sick enough to stop frequenting bars every night. And now winning this suit.

I'm just amazed at the injustice of all this ..... but on a good note, I'm doing very well.

I could use some encouraging words.

Love,
Jo

<small>[ February 03, 2005, 12:31 PM: Message edited by: Resilient ]</small>

Jo,

It will catch up with her--

And something to think about--she may have won the million dollar lawsuit, but her lawyer will keep about 20% of it--and the government will get their portion of it for taxes--and she won't be left with much--

And then once she's out of money (mr wonderful) your ex-h will probably hit the road--because she won't have all that money--he's probably marrying her for-- <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Hi Jo,

Sympathy and commiserations. Disgusting, isn't it? On the bright side, is the $1,000,000 before or after taxes? Lump sum or payments?

Don't worry, she'll blow it and be poor again. Probably have an extravagent VD day wedding, pay for more plastic surgery (face lift anyone?) buy some fancy trucks or cars, honestly it won't go far.

Still, it sucks. And she's marrying your ex. Yow.

double post

<small>[ February 03, 2005, 12:19 PM: Message edited by: Bellevue ]</small>

Well Jo, I hope the taxation and lawyers fees of her 'winnings' are high. The price all have who have had the misfortune of knowing or dealing with her has already been high.

IMHO, I doubt the $$ w/b a cure for her. It will just fling her into a realm that she will find uncomfortable. It all looks good and fun now but wait until she has to live in this new status...... think her conduct will change? Nope. She may now be able to shop at Nordstroms or Saks but she may find herself out of place. My point is that she has defined herself and to try and make herself fit in another lifestyle will be interesting to watch......to say the least.

You though, my dear don't have those type of worries. You are comfortable with yourself and no matter where you go, you are ok. In fact, you are great. Walking through a flea market/open market, strolling through the most expensive stores, is something you can move through with elegance and grace. See when one is ok with themselves, it doesn't matter where they are, they are ok. If one has to phony themselves or buy their way into a supposed better life, then it is only a matter of time, when that life turns on them.

She will have more worries than she will ever imagine. This won't be the end of her problems. Nope...... just watch. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Take care, Jo..... you were and are still waaay better than any OP. I'll send you some Hawaiian popcorn if you want to sit back and watch the comedy show. LOL!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

L.

<small>[ February 03, 2005, 12:34 PM: Message edited by: Orchid ]</small>

I don't know the whole history on how your ex-H left, but I will say, those that do wrong, will only make you look better in the end. As long as you keep your grace and yourself in the right, God will venge for the bad things your ex-H and his OW has done. But don't harp on it. Don't wish on it. Just forget about it and move on...God will take care of the rest...

As for the popcorn, I think you will get a chance to eat it and sit back and watch the show. And what will really be interesting is when your exH comes back wanting to get some comfort out of his bad outcome with OW. Be strong and be the beautiful person you already are...I am so happy that your cancer is in remission. I have a friend going through breast cancer treatment now, and I find it really hard to harp on my H leaving me, when she is fighting for her life. So I will pray for you and hope that you stay in the clear.

Nomoregames

They've got each other! I don't know about you, but I don't see that as "good things" happening to either of them.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Smile Jo, and don't give either of them the power over you to determine your happiness or sadness.

My indifference toward my ex is actually sliding more toward pity. He has lost so much, no matter what 'face' he gives me.

From one jo to another!

Jo, it is my experience (not personal), but through people I know, that fools and their money are soon parted. I know a man who was an OM and an unabashed homewrecker who won a $2 mil award. Three years later, the money is gone, and his drinking/partying lifestyle worsened and compromised his health.

I wish you nothing but good Jo. Money doesn't buy happiness. It can buy a "lifestyle" temporarily--but not brains, health, class, or a myriad of truly important things.

Best
jo

Hi Jo! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I don't blame you for being upset. For a little while... then take a deep breath, and work on letting it go.

"Good things happen to Nice People" - too. I was just watching a local update on the Extreme Home Makeover people that are here in our city, rebuilding a house for a very worthy family. Totally cool!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> The show will run in a few weeks.

Bad things happen to nice people too. I think I'm nice, anyway <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> . I am going through bankruptcy, thanks to the ExH. grrrrrr...... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> But, I'm breaking free of the final ties to him, and can put everything behind me and move forward.

But... you and I can choose where to go from here. Lets re-focus on what we have control over - the ONLY thing we have control over - ourselves. Choose to work on yourself, and focus on yourself, TAKE CARE of yourself, and let them go. They might live happily ever after - or not. It doesn't matter. Don't let them determine your future, ok? Jo can be happy, no matter what they do.

hugs,
Faith1

<small>[ February 03, 2005, 03:25 PM: Message edited by: Faith1 ]</small>

Jo,

It is tough watching them get married....but really...don't be fooled by appearances. How could it be wonderful considering the way their relationship started? Would you want to be in her situation...always having to justify how their relationship started? Yuck!

You have always given such wonderful advice...you know what is important in life...your day will come....and when that time comes, I bet you will look back on them with a whole different attitude and will be thankful that you are where you are. I admire the qualities I have seen in your posts. The hard part is to not care about them anymore---I am struggling with that also. Hang in there---we will survive this and have a good life too. (And money, though nice to have, does not equate happiness!!) Pat

Harrassed you during your cancer treatments?! And was your H's OW too?! What a loser she must be!

Hope this is encouraging to you: KARMA! We all have to live with it..sometimes that's to our benefit..sometimes it's to our detriment. If he'll cheat with her, he'll cheat on her and the same for her.

Anyone who'd do all that AND have 4 illegitimate kids with married men (plural?), can't really care about the men or her own kids. That will, as someone else said, catch up to her. Ugh!

I could go on and on. You're better off without him. I'm sure it still hurts. Being betrayed even by a jerk is the pits. I've been there!

jo,

I am thinking of you and know how strong and wonderful you are that you are going to be fine!!! And you know that!!!!

Take care and hold that head high!!!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Unfortuantly personal injury cases are not taxed.
But you mention a "judge" which means they had a trial? Lawyers usually get 35-45% for trials
and 33% for settlements PLUS expenses. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

What upsets me is that medical device companies have to defend these suits even after they find no medical evidence (Big business vs the welfare mom). She has no concept on how to manage money (or earn it, if she has been on welfare). The money will be gone in no time.

SOM

.. Lawyers take 40 percent. That cuts it down to $600K. Once her Financial Status changes, typically, 'Welfare' also immediately changes - she'll LOSE all that and will have only her Settlement money to live on - and yes, she DOES have to report it - if she doesn't and the government finds out - they will TAKE BACK a lot and it's not pretty.
Her and her man will be broke within a year. Peeps like that can't save money, nor do they know how to use it wisely - just ask my ex...
SDLOM

Thanks everyone.

I don't have much detail regarding the legal details of the lawsuit's outcome. The only upside regarding this awarded monetary fraud is that Ryan (OC) will hopefully somehow benefit from it. I pray they will invest in his future education for college, although not likely.

We all talk about how a relationship born in adultery fraught with lies and deceit will fail, but I wonder if the people in them ever really look back or are affected by those facts. I'm starting to believe they skate through it and come out smelling like a rose.

I thank you all for your support. It really helps me reading your words of encouragement.

God bless All!

Love,
Jo

Resilient,

--We all talk about how a relationship born in adultery fraught with lies and deceit will fail, but I wonder if the people in them ever really look back or are affected by those facts. I'm starting to believe they skate through it and come out smelling like a rose.

TR--That depends some do, some don't--

As a Christian I believe that those who die w/out Christ will one day pay for their deeds--AND that
what they receive in this world--is ALL they will ever receive--in this life and the next--

And if by chance they accept Christ as their Savior before they die--most will at least try and make amends to those they hurt the most--even if by writing them a letter--or telling someone else

Hi TR,

OW touts being a Christian and had accepted Christ. She voice paged my husband during their affair and said "God won't give you your future until you accept it" ... in desperate support of him leaving me, which he did do.

And now they have accepted their future together in the name of Christianity.

So although what you have witten sounds right TR, how do you explain her believing that him leaving me for her was a Christian thing to do and blessed?

p.s. I consider myself Christian. But I must be a different type of Christian than OW, as what she considered blessed by God seems distorted to me. But who am I to judge.

<small>[ February 06, 2005, 05:34 PM: Message edited by: Resilient ]</small>

Resilient,

I'm curious do they go to church??

Are they planning on getting married in the church? If so, maybe you could call the pastor and let HIM know about how their relationship started--

And no, that is not being vengeful, but it's allowing HIM the option to marry them or not based on knowing ALL of the truth--and maybe even confront them with what the Bible says--

No, they do not attend church. And YES, they are getting married in a Christian non-demoninational church by a pastor.

They are having a big white Christian wedding with all the trimings.

I do know they both lie (by omission) that my husband was ever married to me. During a custody battle for Ryan against his mom, they documented a testimony which I read eluding that my husband was single until he became engaged to OW. They both pretend I never existed.

Jo

Resilient,

Get your divorce documents to prove them wrong <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />