I did good...I wanted so much to reach out and hold him...to say, please Jeff, come home...but I didn't...I know the Lord has to do what He has to do...and He doesn't need my help...Oh God! Take this pain away please....

Kathleen

<small>[ February 13, 2005, 10:12 PM: Message edited by: Kathleen40 ]</small>

we are sorry for your pain.

But remember the verse that says if an unbeliever or also refers to an unrepentant spouse leaves, we are to LET them go as we are commanded to live in peace.

I don't think our Creator has a part in what your x is doing right now. Your x is walking outside boundaries of faith, reason, and morality...he's violating laws of man and creator. But an x is an x...gotta let him go. Quite possibly maybe he will find his way. Maybe not.

Again, we don't know your history ...at least I do not. Could help better if we did.

Would like to add tiny piece of advice. Search MB and find "divorce busting 180". Begging, pleading, being a doormat basically will NOT bring a WS home. Also, Love Must Be Tough emphasises similar principle of not chasing after a WS. Makes you look needy and you need to appear as the opposite.

Ask yourself what is attractive about somebody begging? Or pleading? It may , in your eyes, show that you love him and miss him...but to him it just pushes him further away. Lean the 180.

If you wish to work to restore your M, then we'll be glad to offer advice. Also, gen questions II is a good board for that. We're kinda in the moving on phase, but we love to offer support to anybody who wishes to positively reconcile...

Now get ahold of yourself. Breathe. THINK. REad about the 180. Learn why chasing, begging, pleading is NOT attractive to somebody out there cheating...and incidentally chasing somebody else. You gotta turn the tide. In your favor. But besides doing it for reconciliation, do it for YOU. Live life each day to your best.

Sympathy to you. I know it feels like a living death. I second the recommendation of Divorce Busting. And I applaud your NOT clinging as he left. THat took a lot of guts.

Thanks to both of you...Your right, I haven't yet submitted my life story with WS but I will soon...

Blessings to you both,
Kathleen