I am new to this site and there is a circumstance that I feel that I do not have anyone to turn to. I may only be 19 years old, but please hear me out: I have had a rough childhood; abuse, neglect, etc.

I was a student at a high school of the name of Central High School in Raytown, Missouri. I was adopted at age 15. She was very rude and used me for money. I did not like that at all. It was very sickening. I had money that came in the mail for me through the government and she gets her hands on it before I can even touch it. She threatned to kill me and hits me and everything. She was very volatile towards me and the other children in the house hold. She had a boyfriend and she would come up with these farfetched things about me and him that I stopped asking him for help on my homework. So I endured her disrespect for 3 years. And when I turned 18. I decided to get a job at a public library. I also went to school in my senior year. And I met this teacher who was new to the school district and he taught Spanish. Technically, he majors in music and his minor is Foreign Language (Spanish). We talked and talked during orientation. I met him on my birthday, which was August 20th 2001. I talked about how eager I was to go to college and continue my education. The school year started 8/27/01. He talked to this teacher who also taught Spanish. She was so mean and nasty and had hygiene problems (hair not taken care of, menstration smells, etc). The students did not have any respect for her. He used to take her home everyday, and she was just as nasty and mean to us. She was a black bigot, also. She talked about how the students' mother shouldn't have produced them and how they should be exterminated in gas chamber and facetous things like that.
But on the weekends me and the Spanish teacher that I talk to had always met at the job on the weekends to help me with scholarships. Then I would thank him and he went on home. I also had an additional job on the school grounds as a bus monitor. So I had to get up extra early in the morning, and walk to school. The male Spanish teacher would always invite me into his classroom to put my head down and get a little rest until it was time for me to go outside and monitor the bus arrivials. When it was raining, he offered me an umbrella and told me that I can keep it. He wsa so sweet and nice to me. He gave me money if I needed it.

But on September 25th 2001, two weeks after the terrorist attack, my adopted mother kicked me out of her home because she did not get any money for me in the mail and the little money I was making at my job she tried to swindle me out of it as well and I refused to give in, so she threw me out. So I stayed with my coussin and her family. I got along with ber family real good without any problem. I got my hair permed and everything. I was just experiencing being my own woman. Me and my cousin would always woman to woman talks when I wasn't able to get to sleep at night. We would laugh and joke about things. So this Spanish helped me transfer my money to a new bank and everything. He paid for my deposit to start the bank acct. He took me every pay day to deposit my check. I would stay after school with him and he would take me to work and he would be there late at night to take me back to my cousin's house. I finally confided in him one day that my mother kicked me out and how she treated me. He stated, "I would let you stay with me, but that would be crossing student/teacher relationship." He helped me call shelters. I told him that I am doing fine with my cousin to tell the truth.

A week later he asked me, "Would you object if you were in my custody?" I told him to give me a while to think about that. He took that female mean and nasty Spanish teacher home and when he dropped me off, he asked me the same question. And I told him that I would not object. He claimed he wanted a teenage daughter. He wanted to do an adult adoption. He was 52 and I was 18 at the time.

So I decided to trust him and that female teacher
told the principal and tried to get him fired. So they argued and argued and he decided to stop taking her home. He told me that I am just as important as she was. We started living together October 8th 2001 and he started making sexual advances at me two weeks after we started living together and things ended up leading to another. (Kissing on the stomach, breast, tongue action sexual encounters etc). I had decided to resign at my job at the public library on the 31st of October 2001 because I was falling behind in schoolwork. So I decided that I will finish school and I will work later. November 4th 2001, I had to swithch schools just because of the rumors that decided to pop up and he was about to lose his job. He treated me more of a girlfriend than a daughter. He kept on saying that we are father and daughter, but he kisses me in an undaughterly manner (on the neck, tongue action, etc). But anyways, the school he met me from was spreading rumors, saying that I am this teacher's girlfriend and that I am his wife, and he came home and told me one day that someone said that I was bragging and saying that I was 'shacking up with him.' And I did not, but I do not know if he really believes me. So he suggested that I should not go to that school anymore to visit my friends at anytime. I told him that I regret for going to Central High School. And he told me that I do not have to feel guilty about it. I am confused about this. Can't you readers tell that I am so far?

Then the month of February he call himself adopting me. He told me that it was symbolic, meaning that we are pretending like we are father and daughter so no one would suspect anything else.

He acts like he did not want to be bother at night anymore, but he gets real jealous when I talk about another man who likes me, and he tries to act like a boyfriend. It is so wierd. He keeps on claiming that he would be crazy to marry a 18 yr. old woman but yet he told me that this adoption is more like a marriage.

In June 2002, I had applied at Apple Market grocery and got hired on the spot, I needed some clothes to wear so when I get my first paycheck, I was going to buy some clothes. Well I felt that he is trying to tell me how to spend my own money. He used another reversee psychology by saying, "Go on ahead. I don't need your money. I make three times as much as you make anyway." He has been hollering at me sometimes and saying that I am causing problems and he knows that that is not true.

I am now attending college. But the problem is that the principal did not renew his teaching license becuase of this, so I feel like I am at fault because he is taking it out on me and denies that he is. Currently he is interviewing at a Catholic School to see if he can get a job in vocal music. He moved from Raytown to St. Louis. And it is ten times as worse as the last school he was employed in -- a lot of violence in the school, police coming everyday, false fire alarms, etc. He is thinking about resigning if he gets hired at this job. But in ways I feel like he is trying to chase me out of the home to make it look like I am the one who has chosen to not be around or to make it look like it is all my fault. This is because he is telling me that I want to have the last word. Now it seems like we cannot get along as good as we did anymore. He had just called me crazy a few days ago. When he sat up there and called me crazy, I sometimes think, "You are one who is crazy by picking up on a high school student. It is a lot of things that I have found out. I found out that he cannot get a teaching job at Sprinfield schools because they said that he was touching a female student. Another thing that made me upset was that when he writes a cover letter for a job, he tends to tell people that I have never met that I have been in a abusive background, and that I am his "full-time responsibility. That makes it look like I am a dummy or something. And when I told him about him writing personal things to people about me and he tried to use reverse psychology on me, saying "I thought that you were on my side.

I feel funny about this. He is diabetic. The problem is that he acts loke he does not want to be around me as much anymore for the past few months, every since the adoption went through. I asked him last month, "Why have you been acting like you don't want to be around me?" He said, "Do you want to be here? Do you want to be my daughter, becuase I feel like you don't want to be my daughter anymore." I COULD HALFWAY BELIEVE AND NOT BELIEVE THAT HE SAID THAT when he started making the sexual advances on me first. I am definitely confused about that. I wanted to know if you think that he is willing to be a father and I am not quite picking it up as well as I should or what? Should I follow along with him? Tell me.

If he wants to "be a father", he wants to be an incestous one. A decent father would NOT make sexual advances on his daughter.

I would get away from this man, pronto.

I don't get this story at all. You are practically an adult. What could you possibly need adopting for?? I do not mean to sound insensitive, and forgive me if I do. But really. You have got to be smarter than this. This man is an obvious freak. Would you ask questions if your biological father was kissing you and putting his TONGUE into the picture?? C'mon, girl. Be for real. You should have NO doubts about this man. HE IS TROUBLE. LEAVE HIM ALONE. You don't owe him a thing.

You do not owe him anything.

You have a job, look for a roommate wanted ad or ask friends if they want to share an apt together. Finish college. You can do it.

I work with a girl who got her own apt at 17, worked full time, and went to college full time. It was hard but she did it. You could work full time to support yourself and go to college part time to ease the stress. I currently work full time, go to school part time, I have a husband and 3 kids.

Positive attitude will prevail

This man is a pedophile, preying on young teens! He is not doing anything that is fatherly here. He is sexually abusing you and the relationship you have is purely manipulative at best.

You are too smart not see your own words above. Clearly, you are not the first girl(student) he has been inappropiate with, I doubt you will be the last.

He is responsible for his behavior and the outcome of it, losing face, embarassment, rumours, yada yada yada

lol. Was this supposed to be a joke?

I just can't see this as being a real situation.

uh, adopting at 18? what the heck?

Anyway, if it's for real, you really need help if you're unable to see for yourself what this guy is all about. It's plain as day from where I'm sitting.

Official4sure, I don't know how you came to this site but please understand that you have been a victim of abuse.

That abuse need not continue. GET OUT of that evil man's home. Get some help--look into getting some counselling so you don't make the same poor choices again.

You are an adult. You have had a difficult life but you can make it better. You have an amazing opportunity to turn things around now.

I'd highly recommend that you avoid dating until you work through some of the horrendous things that have happened to you. Take care of you and get better.

Life can get better if you start making the right choices. The first and smartest choice is to get as far away from this terrible man. It will take a lot of courage but you are a survivor and you can do this.

All the best to you.

How are you doing? Have you taken any of the advice?

There are places and people that can help you out of this situation. You can go to any church and talk to anyone there. Look online for teen centers in your area. You may be an adult now, but you still need a helping hand.

Time will pass and the sooner you get out of that abusive situation the sooner you will begin to heal you heart and gain the strength to carry on. He is a bad man, no matter how much you think he has helped you. Get away from him!

I've been on my own since 16, it was a very hard and lonely road. I joined the military to give me strength and direction. That helped pay for college and gave me tons of self-esteem. Now I'm in my 30's, very successful (financially & spiritually). I am recently married to a loving man who has helped me heal all my childhood wounds. I also live in a nice & safe home of my very own. Go to work and put one foot in front of the other, you will get there, with or without the help of anyone else!
And if it's without the help, then you can look back and say, "I'm so proud of myself, I did this all on my own, how absolutely wonderful!"

Good luck, sweetheart!