I think women can be "just friends" with men, but very few men can be just friends with women without thinking more... I've tried so many times through the years to have my just male friends, when I was single, when I was married. They were always thinking more, hoping for more... sort of steamed me in a way. Why can't men and women be friends without the sexual implications? They do it in Europe, I have German friends that think this is a funny American thing, that we can't be friends with the opposite sex even if we knew them long before we married. Currently I have a just a friend while I'm separated, I've known him 10 years, there's never been anything, never will but I was telling him a few personal problems with my marriage and he said "I sure wish I could get a date with you..." Come on, if something were to happen it would have, it's insane. But this is how it's been my life. I'm more comfortable with men, I grew up with brothers, but it just never works to be just friends. I tried and posted on this site, that I emailed some men in my town on a singles site. Said I just wanted to email, of course it turned into more. I agree that I compromised as I don't know if my marriage is over. I guess I just wanted to know there was life out there. My husband is in anger management for 8 months, I'm busy with my baby and my business, and my sick dad. That's enough. Sometimes I think I'll just be single the rest of my life and not complicate things, but men and women are meant to be together it seems. Life is driving me crazy lately, if it weren't for men...

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by horsey:
<strong> I think women can be "just friends" with men, but very few men can be just friends with women without thinking more... </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Totally disagree with that statement. Even if I am one of the "very few" men who can just be friends with a woman, I've had far too many women "friends" who were thinking more. I, honestly, don't think this is necessarily a gender specific issue rather an extension of ones place emotionally and dare I say spititually.

And to the overall subject, yes, men and women can be "just" friends, I've never disputed that and actually whole heartidly agree with it. HOWEVER, at times when one or both of them are emotionally "needy" a dangerous element can be introduced. Therefore I do believe that while one is going through desparate times (i.e. divorce) it's not necessarily the best time to be seeking opposite sex friends.

OK Lost! Or should I call you Harry? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

OK being that you are a guy, so you think men have a different agenda huh?

I do have male friends. A couple of them are married. So I would hate to think what they think of me??????? Hummm, see that is why you men are impossible to deal with. We never know what the heck you guys are really thinking!!!!
AHHAHAHAHHAH!

Sex, sex, sex sex, more sex and so on and so on! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Ali~

I know I will always have love for my H. because of the history. But I cannot stand to be around a person who has hurt me and continues to hurt me and refuses to get help for it. Pretending that problems don't exist doesn't help the marriage. I have been disconnected from my husband for a long time now. Yes, it is not easy to fall out of love but it does happen. Am I in love with my husband? No. That went away with time. Will I miss him. Yes. Because he was the only man I really knew over the last 17 years. But I know what is best for me and he is not. Again, his affair was the icing on the cake. It had opened my eyes to the kind of emotional abuse (controling) that I have been dealing with for years now. And when he bailed out on me with MC and refuse to deal with the marriage problems I knew it was time.

Ali~

<small>[ March 15, 2005, 09:03 AM: Message edited by: Ali88 ]</small>