Hi all, this is very long but it brought tears to my eyes and helped to put things into perspective, hopefully it will be of some help to you guys...God bless<P>Awakenings<P>A time comes in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst<BR>of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere<BR>the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying<BR>or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind<BR>tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink<BR>back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at<BR>the world through new eyes. This is your awakening.<P>You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to<BR>change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the<BR>next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince<BR>Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world there<BR>aren't always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that<BR>any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you and in the<BR>process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.<P>You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will<BR>always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK.<BR>(They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the<BR>importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process a sense<BR>of new found confidence is born of self-approval.<P>You stop *****ing and blaming other people for the things they did to you<BR>(or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really<BR>count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what<BR>they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be<BR>there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand<BR>on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of<BR>safety & security is born of self-reliance.<P>You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as<BR>they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in<BR>the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness. You<BR>realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you,<BR>is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained<BR>into your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been<BR>fed about how you should behave, how you should look and how much you<BR>should weigh and what you should wear and where you should shop and what<BR>you should drive how and where you should live and what you should do for<BR>a living who you should sleep, with who you should marry and what you<BR>should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children<BR>or what you owe your parents.<P>You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you<BR>begin reassessing and redefining who you are what you really stand for.<BR>You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to<BR>discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have<BR>bought into to begin with and in the process you learn to go with your<BR>instincts. You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that<BR>there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop<BR>maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.<BR>You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the<BR>outdated ideals of a by gone era but the mortar that holds together the<BR>foundation upon which you must build a life. You learn that you don't<BR>know everything, it's not your job to save the world and that you can't<BR>teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and<BR>responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to<BR>say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to<BR>carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.<P>Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love,<BR>how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You<BR>learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship.<BR>You learn that you will not be, more beautiful, more intelligent, more<BR>lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that<BR>bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are<BR>and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people,<BR>situations and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change<BR>so it is with love.... and you learn that you don't have the right to<BR>demand love on your terms... just to make you happy. And, you learn<BR>that alone does not mean lonely... And you look in the mirror and come<BR>to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10<BR>and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and<BR>agonizing over how you "stack up."<P>You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing<BR>things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of<BR>entitlement are perfectly OK....and that it is your right to want things<BR>and to ask for the things that you want...and that sometimes it is<BR>necessary to make demands.<P>You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love,<BR>kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less. And,<BR>you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorify you<BR>with his touch... and in the process you internalize the meaning of<BR>self-respect.<P>And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to<BR>care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet,<BR>drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that<BR>fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take<BR>more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our<BR>soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.<P>You learn, that for the most part, in life you get what you believe you<BR>deserve... and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You<BR>learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing<BR>for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen.<P>More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need<BR>direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can<BR>do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help.<P>You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber<BR>baron of all time. FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through<BR>your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and<BR>to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms.<BR>And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under<BR>a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you<BR>don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things<BR>happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to<BR>personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to<BR>answer your prayers. It's just life happening.<P>And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. You<BR>learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be<BR>understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and<BR>poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are<BR>wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.<P>You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things<BR>we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can<BR>only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm<BR>bed, a long hot shower.<P>Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you<BR>to make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever to<BR>settle for less than your heart's desire. And you hang a wind chime<BR>outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point<BR>to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful<BR>possibility. Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your<BR>side you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design<BR>the life you want to live as best as you can.<P>
