hi all. just writing because we will soon be getting the notice to go for the DNA testing. 3 months after we filed all our paperwork, they are finally getting around to it. i check the stupid court website almost everyday, waiting and waiting for another little stab, this DNA test. i guess it will finally bring a little bit of finality to this all. and start us on the child support road and living from check to check. we haven't really financially prepared for this, so now i am gonna. <P>i think i will go take his name off the checking account, or put his as a signer? someone once mentioned that. he already has his own checking acct at a different bank, so we just won't be able to put his checks in my account. that won't be all that terrible. i am just bracing myself for the emotional stress that will soon follow. anyone know about how long it takes for the DNA test to come back once both parties have submitted their genetic material??<P>i know we should have been financially preparing for all this stuff, but i was in a bit of denial. it is like i know all this stuff is pending out there, but it is not here yet, and i am just living like it isn't.<P>babst, you said your payments are $600/ month. how much does your husband make, and does OW work?? if you don't want to say, i understand, just wondering. we think we are looking at about $450/month for current and who knows how much welfare we will have to pay back... the thought of that alone terrifies me. luckily my H has nothing in his name of value and no savings so they will just have to take what they can from his check. and he will work for cash under the table to make up for some of it. he is in construction.<P>well, i have gone on too long. just bracing you all for my sure to come rants and raves and probably tears when the DNA test comes thru. even though i am positive it is his baby, the DNA results are gonna hurt.<P>oh, and today is OC's 3rd birthday. whoopdeedoo. H is avoiding his cell phone in case she calls wanting him to go to her birthday party or something. i wouldn't doubt she would call for something like that. and i pray she doesn't take her for the DNA test. i wish she would leave us alone.<P>take care all, and i will talk to ya later.<P>happy_girl<p>[This message has been edited by happy_girl (edited October 06, 2000).]

happy_girl,<P>I know the feeling of waiting around for the results. My H took his in mid july and we didn't get the results back until end of August (when all broke loose AGAIN!) He had practically convinced me that it couldn't be his because he says he wore a comdon each time..(yeah, sure you did). And although I always knew while I waited that it could be his...the results were still devastating and hurtful. Because then it became "real". It felt like someone had hit me with a truck. I don't know how much H will have to pay for OC. That will be decided next week at court date. It's so frustrating that other people...strangers, have so much control over our lives right now. It almost seems surreal. I still become so angry and disappointed with my H when I think that he brought this unnecessary worry, anxiety and financial burden upon us...all for what? to lay with a cheap, easy tramp who he barely knew and now she's the mother of his child? Doesn't make sense. I'll never understand it. He used the wrong "head" to think with. If he'd been using the one on his shoulders, we wouldn't be looking toward more cs. Just take it one day at a time. The results will come in. In the meantime, go on with your daily life and taking good, good care of yourself. I won't tell you not to think about it, because you will. Just keep doing all the normal things you do everyday. It helps. I'll be thinking of you. <P>Comfort<P>

We got DNA done through a private company. We got the results by regular mail about 4-5 weeks after the last person gave a blood sample at a local lab. I still recall how my hands shook and my insides jello-d reading it. Hang tough. This too will pass.

Happy Girl:<P>We never really received any lab reports, letters, DNA results until we went to court and the judge announced that it was 99.9%. That was about ten weeks after my husband took the test. Still, we have no written proof, no report of any kind.<P>I knew from the beginning it was my husband's. It didn't surprise me. In a way, it was better for me not having to read the results and have them staring at me in black and white. Hearing it spoken so quickly in the courtroom, shoved inbetween other issues, made it seem like it was a mere technicality in the big scheme of things. For some reason, it wasn't so bad. I knew anyway. It was almost a relief to have it confirmed one way or the other.<P>What was kind of satisfying was that the OW and judge were upset and frustrated because my husband refused to admit that he was the father. <BR>My husband kept saying, "I admit, according to the DNA results, that they say I am the father, but I have no lab report" And the judge said, "Then you admit you are the father." My husband replied, "According to you, the results say I am the father." Then the attorney says to OW, "Is that good enough?" She said "No."<P>For some reason, his 'admission' was a big deal and he refused to do it in a way that satisfied the OW, and that upset her.<P>Hahahahahaha<P>Catnip =^^=

thanks guys. so maybe this will be my christmas present. wonderful. knowing the courts it will still take them a month to actually notify us that he has to go for the test. but i guess that it will be better to just get it all over with and so we can get on with our lives. pay the CS, and go on with life. if she holds up to her word, which i don't believe for a second, she won't be taking us back every time she thinks he is making more money. and since she doesn't work, we should be able to claim OC on H's tax returns and that will help us to pay the back support back quicker because they will intercept any refunds. at least that is the way i understand it. it gets confusing. i told H last night when he came home, actually when he was on his way home in the car. i warned him it would be just like her to call because it is OC's birthday. and now that all of a sudden she seem's to want a father for her kid, when for 2 years+ she didn't, he wants to avoid answering his cell phone. <P>i'm rambling. thanks again for the support. talk to ya'll later.<P>happy_girl