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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 183
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I had a counceling session with Jenn tonight and we came to the conclusion that it was time to move to Plan B. After much discussion, I feel really good about this course of action. Jenn said that I will be able to do some healing when I'm not faced with so many "in your face" reminders of my W's A. Since my W will be bedridden for the next 3 months at least, she will have all the time in the world to think. I hope this works, but if not I know that at this point I have to Plan B. Too much cruel and unusual punishment endured here, so I'm moving on.<BR>Floored
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 1,884
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Floored,<P>I can't say that I know how hard this decission was for you to make. I can only imagine. I really hope that all works out for you, and that whatever comes of this, that you will be happy in the end. I will continue to pray for you in this time of transition.<P>Tigger
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937
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floored:<P>I saw something in the wording of your post that has me concerned.<P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>so I'm moving on.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>As long as you're saying "I'm moving to Plan B..." I'll relax.<P>In Plan B, you want to leave the following impression (and a letter) with your wife:<P>1. You believe in the marriage<BR>2. The separation is done to save your love for her<BR>3. Once the affair is over and she's no longer in contact with OM, you would welcome a chance to reconcile.<P>Remember, Plan B has nothing to do with 'forgetting your wife', dating, or doing anything actively against your marriage. It's just a mechanism for you to protect what love is left for your spouse, while the affair eventually burns out.<P>Good luck---I hope you're not in Plan B for too long...<P>
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Joined: Mar 1999
Posts: 2,430
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My prayers for you, the kids, and your marriage! Angels comin' your way ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif)
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 183
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 183 |
K,<BR>Take it easy and take a deep breath. I'm in it for the long haul!! I have no desire in the world to pursue another relationship at this time, my kids fill all my time so that part is easy. I think I told ya'll on an earlier thread that when my W told me that OM was with her at the hospital, it really did a number on me. I think that was God's way of telling me that I needed to do something different, He didn't specifically say "Plan B", but I think MB has been that tool He sent to help me through this mess. I am going to work on the Plan B letter today and send it within the next few days. Do you think it is a good thing to Plan B right before Christmas, Jenn thinks the sooner the better and I tend to agree. I think spending Christmas away from her home might help get her thinking.<BR>Floored
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937
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Posts: 6,937 |
I think you want to try to get this out ASAP, so that you avoid it as a "Christmas present" to your wife. <P>If you want, post your letter here and I can help you with it (unless you can email it to Jenn and have her help you with it...).<P>Deep breath taken... I kinda figured that was what you meant, but it's not bad to spell it out---people lurk on these boards and use the advice without ever posting.
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 183
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Thanks K, I'll try and work on it and post it maybe tonight or in AM. I have to see my W on Thurs., so I'll make that a really nice time for her and leave her with an awesome reminder of how much I love her.
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