This is a thread dedicated to the special things we share with our spouses that the OP's were never privy to.<P>There are so many wonderful things about my husband and about our marriage. I tell him that I always wanted to be a backup singer for Tina Turner and he doesn't laugh at me. He says, "Oh, B, you would have been so good." <P>He calls me "B". It's a nickname that has evolved from it's early beginnings when we married in 1980. He started calling me his 'beautiful baby', then it went to "Boo Baby", then just "Boo" but too many people thought he was calling me 'fool'("what did you just call her?") so it evolved once again to "Boochi", then "Boo-kee", then finally just "B".<P>He sings me funny songs, lyrics revamped to songs like "So Happy Together" by the Turtles. "Imagine me and B...no matter how they toss the dice, it had to be, the only girl for me is B, so happy together...I can't see me loving nobody but B" and so on. Or "fly me to the moon and let me seranade the stars...." and the ever popular "Volare" where he sings "no wonder my happy heart sings, your love has given me wings, let me fly like and eagle and bark like a beagle whenever you come in the room"<P>The best time is in the evening when the day is done, we have dinner and watch the news. We have two sofas across from each other; he sits on one and me on the other, and I'll catch him staring at me and he'll say, "You are so beautiful, B, I just love looking at you." Or he'll say, "I am so grateful to you, I am so happy with you and so glad I am here with you. you make me complete."<P>Today, after shoveling our driveway, he came in the house and said, "I was thinking of what life would be like if I would have stayed away and gone to NY. My life would be a living hell listening to her complain and demand and *****. I would pine away for you all my life, miss you for the rest of my life and what's worse is I'd probably live to 90 knowing what I couldn't have."<P>I am pretty stunned by these incredible declarations I've been receiving pretty regularly since June 1999, and especially since the medication started last summer. His medication (neurontin) makes him see things the way they really are instead of in some weird manic destructive hallucination.<P>My husband has a very creative and charasmatic personality and an incredible dry wit. I enjoy him immensely. He is bright and very intelligent even if his judgment is a bit skewed when it comes to business decisions. To be fair, however, he has saved the day with brillant coups a couple times that impressed me and I'm a tough critic.<P>I love his soulful eyes-they're a very deep navy blue. He has the most beautiful smile and laugh. I love his hands. They're wide and slightly calloused and a little rough. He's tall and muscular and has a little belly from too much holiday. He's loosing his hair on top but he looks great to me. The sides and his beard are grey.<P>He reminds me of Kennedy with his personality and ability to work a room. People are attracted to him and he is so interested in everyone he meets, always remebering names. I am always so proud of him.<P>And all this is mine and mine alone. These things were only shared with me. The OW never knew these things about my husband, caught glimpses maybe, enough to attract her, I suppose, but never knew his heart.<P>Catnip =^^=

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>And all this is mine and mine alone. These things were only shared with me. The OW never knew these things about my husband, caught glimpses maybe, enough to attract her, I suppose, but never knew his heart.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><BR>It's great ,the sharing part. My H has told me pretty much the same things.<BR>I get to share his bed,his life, and his love. She got stolen minutes,perhaps an hour or two,I get "as long as we live" and so much more.<P>Great words Catnip... as usual......<P> Debi<P><P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

beautiful catnip. here are mine...<P>my hubby is one to make up little songs for us too, changing the lyrics to popular songs. i just love it. there is one that is always special to me and when i hear it reminds me instantly of him. it is in spanish though, so i won't write it out.<P>at night after dinner and while watching t.v. we sit on our couch opposite eachother and give one another a foot massage at the same time. and i always put him to sleep with a little foot or hand massage, or even just playing with his hair.<P>he will pop out of no where and say "do you know how much i love you?". he does bring flowers once in a while too. and when he makes those hallmark cards at the machine at walmart, my heart lights up.<P>he makes me dinner. cooks for my dad and step mom, hey just hanging out with my dad is a sign he loves me. my dad is a tough guy to hang out with.<P>he has lots of little pet names for me. don't think he ever calls me my name, just one of his nick names.<P>he takes care of me when i am sick, takes me on vacations, gives me back rubs. always makes me laugh, makes me mad sometimes too, but all is how he is and the reason i love him.<P>sometimes he will just say "you will never know just how much i love you". he is not always good at expressing him self with words so when he does, i just love to hear what he has to say.<P>we make love. we don't have sex. they never made love. <P>thanks for the idea catnip. very therapeutic. <P>happy_girl<BR>

Catnip, your husband is a lucky man,<P> I remember the first time I went to pick up my wife at her place. She opened the door just in time to see a pigeon crap on my forehead. Her face went white, and she stuttered asking if I needed some toilet paper. I looked up and said " No, that bird's long gone, he'll have to find his own." We still laugh about that day.<P> I remember kissing my wife for what seemed like hours. I don't mean swabbing each others tonsils. Gentle, ever so gentle kisses, the lightest caressing of each others lips, cheeks, eyes. It was the most wonderful feeling I've ever had.<P> My wife has the most beautiful eyes, big hazel eyes with the longest eyelashes, eyes that definately say "Come hither."<P><BR> I could go on for hours. Thank you, Catnip, for helping me remember times that belong to my wife and I alone.<P> God bless you,<P>------------------<BR><P>Gregg

Dear Catnip,<P>I cannot think of a better time of year to recall all those things that we share with our mates that are truly special.<P>My H holds me in his arms every night as we go to sleep and I wake up to his kiss and embrace. He is there with me every day to make breakfast and help the kids get ready for school. <P>We do not have stolen moments, we share a full and complete life. He wakes up our children every morning and kisses them goodnight when they go to bed. He is there with me when they are sick and he makes tea for me when I am not feeling well.<P>We drive to work together and share the frustrations and joy of our jobs. We both have stressful jobs so we have eaten lunch together every day for the past twenty years! That time is sacred to us since it is the time when we share stories of what went wrong in the morning and re-charge for the afternoon.<P>We cook dinner together at night and play games with the children. We have family night once a week complete with pizza, a video, popcorn and board games.<P>And when the kids go to bed and we turn in for the night we cuddle and talk in bed before we make love. He loves to wake me up in the middle of the night whispering how much he loves me in my ear. And in that moment, there is only him and me in the entire universe.<P>These are only some of the moments that keep me going and keep me as much in love with him as I was the day I married him.<P>Thank you, Catnip! This is a wonderful way to start 2001...<P>- Heavenly

I love reading these. It's a privilege to peek a little into our hearts to reaffirm why we are here fighting so hard for what is ours and ours alone.<P>Heavenly, your post touched me so. I could picture your life and the specialness of it. It made me want to drop by for pizza and conversation.<P>Gregg: You crack me up. Pigeon droppings and all. You have such great humor. It is usually one of the top two or three reasons a woman loves a man...I can't help but think your wife must adore the many wonderful facets of Gregg.<P>Happy Girl! You sound 'in love' and dedicated to your husband. Let him read what you wrote. In fact, we should all print this up when the thread has run its course and present it to our spouses as a gift. This is a little like what we do at Retrouvaille.<P>Catnip =^^=

Oh I really had to think about this because it is so easy to concentrate on all the bad he has done but thank you Catnip for making me look at his good, our good and our history.<P>Our first piece of history is with the birth of our son. I will never forget after 26 hours of labor and him sick with the flu, he looked at me with tears in his eyes and said "Snufflapagus I can never thank you for what you have done". Or the next day coming home with (no exaggeration) 15 packs of pampers, 20 bottles of baby lotion, powder, and shampoo and about 6 packs of wipes.<P>The little song he sings my son to wake him up in the morning to get him ready for school "wake up Jacob...wake up baby...."<BR>He calls me snufflapagus (that ugly critter on Sesame Street). When he cooks dinner and serves it as if I were at 5 star restuarant. The days he is off he cleans the entire house and is waiting at the door when I arrive home. He calls to let me know where he is, when he is working late or just to say hi.<BR>When we are sleeping there has to be one part of him touching me at all times (what a comfort!). Or "Hey Lee what you think about this" or "Lee come quick look at this", my opinion matters to him. <P>Oh he tries and he never stops trying, no matter what my disposition, or if I am "trigger happy" or if he gets frustrated because he doesn't understand. He is always there waiting for me to explain so he can reply "alright Lee I will try". <P>Thanks Catnip for making me take a moment to look at what I do have instead of just at what he has done.<P>Wishing the best in 2001 <P>

just wanted to say i enjoyed reading everyones "mine and mine alones". it was a wonderful idea catnip. i already talked to my hubby about what i posted. we talk about everything. but then he would probably say I talk about everything, since i talk A LOT. not that you couldn't tell or anything.<P>may we all remember these things when we are feeling down, when things seem like they are all wrong. these are the reasons we stay, the reasons we work so hard to keep our marriages together. god bless all of you!<P>happy_girl<P>and catnip, yes, very "in love" still. not blindly, but we are still in love and hope we always will be.

Earlier today I posted at the bible study and I said I don't know why I still love my H. but I do. as I came back this evening there was a thread leading here, I took it out of curiosity, only to find out that comming here was more like devine appointment. <P>To answer my question, Why do I love him?<P>my Husband has the most gorgeous hazel eyes, I used to always get lost in them, they are like windows into his soul. He has the most beutiful soul, he is sensitive and caring.<BR>he has the most gentle hands that could always soothe away my hurts. He would hold me so tenderly and my tensions would just slip away. His kisses were always so soft and gentle like each and every kiss was the first one. <P>I remember that after he kissed me for the first time he appologized because he didn't ask. he was worried i would be offended that he had kissed without permission. <P>When He propossed to me I remember the day like it was yesterday. He had met me in the morning before work and gave me a single red rose. He told me to bring that rose on our date that night. so that night i got all dressed up and gathered my rose and David picked me up for our date. David was also dressed very nicely so you could imagine my surprise when he drove us to the beach, rather than a restaurant. he walked around the car and opened up my door and took my red rose, then he took my hand and led me a short distance down the beach. he dusted off a log for me and seated me on the log overlooking the water. then he said he needed to get something from the car. but before he went back to the care he took off his jacket and draped it over my shoulders to keep away the chill. When he returned from the car he had with him a long white box. He handed me the box and as I opened it I saw the 2 most beutiful white long stemed roses. I was speachless, then he got down in the sand on one knee and took the box from me. he removed the roses from the box and added them to the red rose telling me that the white rose represented the purity of our love and the red rose represented the passion of our love for one another, and that he wanted to spend the rest of his life getting to know me and growing old with me and always being thier for eachother. Then he asked If I would do the honor of becoming his wife.<P>I did not even have to think about it, i knew this was the man I was meant to be with, my soul-mate. <P>I want to thank you for helping me to remeber why I love him, and yes she may have a few stolen moments with him, but I still have HIM, that must count for something.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Irene

Dear Catnip,<P><BR> This is a great thread, These stories are priceless!!<BR> Leelee, can I call you Snuffy?<P> <BR> God bless you, <P>------------------<BR><P>Gregg

Lynton,<BR>You can call me whatever you want!!!! I am even considering changing my username to scruffy!!! Thanks for the laugh!

Now I am laughing even harder....Scruffy! Snuffy is a whole lot better

Dear Snuffy,<P><BR> You're not Scruffy, not even Fluffy. You could be Buffy, Puffy, or maybe Huffy, but never Scruffy, that's way too toughy!!<P><BR> I think that's enoughy, <P>------------------<BR><P>Gregg

Lynton you crack me up!!!

Catnip give yourself a pat on the back you deserve it is a great idea.You guys are nuts thanks for the humor I needed that. <P>When our little girl was born it was so cute to watch H with his big hands trying to clean up this little baby and put her first diaper on her they let him do all this right after she was born. He wanted a little girl so bad. I though for sure she was going to be a boy because she was so big.He stayed right by my side while I was in the hospital he never went home, slept sitting up on a hard chair that was in my room. He had so much fun picking out all these frilly little dresses and shoes for her after we left the hospital. He is a wonderful father to her I have never seen a man care for his child as much as this man does. <P> When I had to sell my greenhouse because I needed the money and just didnt think I would ever care about my flowers again,I had a pretty rough divorce . He made me care again he built me a sunroom off the back porch so I had somewhere to start my plants. In the summer I am out the door before the sun even comes up he will make a wonderful breakfast and surprise me by calling me into the house saying someone is on the phone. <P> He often stops at the store and will bring home all the bargins he found and pack them away in the fridge and cupboards and stand back and be so thrilled with all the goodies he found it makes me laugh. Every spring he will find me the coolest new herbs or flowers and hide them in the yard somewhere and suprise me . <P> He works extra hours so I can stay home with our little girl and work on my business which I have to remind myself of this from time to time when things get rough and he is not around . When anybody new comes over he has to drag them out to my shop and show them all the things Ive made. He is really proud of me and it shows. Something he does everyday is asked what his ladies are going to do today or ask what is ladies did today is something I find very special. Thank you catnip for this thread I think we all needed it. With love flowerseed<P><p>[This message has been edited by flowerseed (edited January 06, 2001).]