Has anyone had any nightmares I should say instead of dreams of ow or oc before they found out. <P> I had a nightmare I cant be sure but I think it was before ow was even pregnate that she had a baby and it was my H and that it was a boy which it was. I remember telling my friend Roxie about it at work and we laughed about it. If it wasnt before she was pregnate it was right around the time she got pregnate. This really freaks me out. <P> I usually dream all the time but for some rreason when all this came out about affair I quit dreaming up until this past month. I have finally started dreaming again or at least remembering my dreams . You guys will probly think I am nuts but I had to ask somebody. with love flowerseed <BR> <BR>

If that makes you nuts then I am too!<P>I had several dreams during the affair that my H had a girlfriend, and in one of them I was screaming at her and her '2 daughters'(that is interesting because at that time XOW had one daughter and, later, her second was my H's!), but my dreams never had the face of the actual XOW, who I knew well. I would tell my H about them, say I didn't understand them, and was there "anything I should know". He would laugh and say no. (haha the joke's on me He has so much to regret)<P>I also quit remembering my dreams for some time after DDay. In fact, I was lucky when I could sleep at all. But in the 2 years since, I've had several dreams about the XOW. I've had a couple where I just screamed at her. I've had some where I alone or our family went to visit the OC (and of course saw the XOW). Nothing ever happens between my H and she in these dreams; I know they are all about my own feelings re:XOW ("friend" betrayal). They usually don't involve any interaction w/OC. I only had one about OC--in it her spirit came to me to tell me she was being molested by her step-grandfather; I didn't tell my H about it as it is an actual possibility and we cannot find out the truth from where we are now. It might be true or it might be my mind acting out something I've already thought of consciously.<P>Dreams are supposedly our subconscious thoughts. I believe your dreams, like mine, were telling you something your consciousness wasn't accepting/believing.

Jenny, this must have really flipped our H out when they heard about these dreams. I remember being real grumpy with him for a few days after. I at the time really didnt think anyway possible that it could be true she was such a scanky little thing I never would think he could have touched something like that. When I told him of this dream he said I dont think so like it was really gross. I knew she was chasing him but I really didnt think he was that low. I trusted him. Uck uck uck is all I can say. thanks Jen good to hear I am not the only one. with love flowerseed

I had a dream while I was pregnant with our D, 8 1/2 yrs ago. I dreamt that I was in competition with a blonde for my H. It was so real, that when it woke me up, I couldn't get back to sleep. I went out to the living room to sit on the couch. When my H asked me if I was ok, I just told him I couldn't sleep. A couple days later, I found some letters from this person from the ship that he had just transfered from in the trash. I read them, and even though there was nothing concrete, I suspected that something was going on. I waited until I knew he would be home soon, laid the letters out on the bed, and went into the bathroom to take a shower. I also locked the bathroom door. He came home and saw the letters, tried the door, then just sat on the bed, waiting for me to come out of the bathroom. When I did, all h*** broke loose. I told him about the dream a couple nights later, when I was up all night crying. BTW, OW was a blonde!!!! I also had thought that she and I were more than aquaintences, since we would talk whenever my H had to spend the night on the ship, and our S and I would go to eat dinner with him. She was on the same schedule as my H. I would even take her D and H home when they were there, and they needed a ride. Like Jenny, I never saw her face, just a shadowed profile, or from the back. It is the only dream I have had. Now, my dreams are of the OM finding out a coming here to cause a lot of trouble, but those are just occasionally, although very vivid. I guess those happen when I am at a low about what has happened in the last couple years, but especially this past year on my part. Hopefully, these dreams are just of my fears, and not of what is going to happen. Like we have said before, we don't want the OM to know about this child due to his violence and threats to my H. Hopefully, soon, these dreams will be the happy ones of raising these 3 children into happy grown-ups.<P>Tigger

Hi guys,<P> Funny thing; I've never had those dreams, but ever since we've been married, my wife has had recurrent dreams about me cheating on her! What's up with that??<P><BR> God bless you,<P>------------------<BR><P>Gregg

Gregg,<P>Maybe it's her guilty conscience?? I know that if I am feeling guilty about something, I tend to dream in the reverse. How are things since Christmas? Hope things get better for you.<P>Tigger

I think the psychological term for that is "projecting". She's projecting her own stuff onto you. My H also joked about ME having a boyfriend during his affair. I thought it was just his insecurity--not!