I stole this quote from someone on the general affair board:<P>Resentment is taking poison, then waiting for the other person to die.<P>This makes me smile when I start obsessive-thinking about that nasty XOW...<P>I hope it makes you smile, too.

That quote always stops me dead in my tracks...makes me laugh, too.<P>One quote that got me through the toughest weeks was:<P>"Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"<P>It kept me hanging in there...instead of hanging.<P>Catnip =^^=

Jenny.....gulp...gulp...gulp...."burp" gulp...mmmmmmm delicious.....I have so much resentment and I can tell you I"M the one dying here........<P> Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

jenny and catnip, both very good quotes and things to think about.<P>my favorite, someone here uses it too, is<P>"insanity is doing the same things over and over and expecting different results"<P>anyone else quotes to share??<P>happy_girl

I love this one that I found in the GQ section:<P>"Forgiveness is giving up my right to hurt you because you hurt me."<P><BR>

Ooooo, you guys said some of my favorites!<P>Another? The serenity prayer:<BR>God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference!<P>(BTW, H and I went to see Castaway last night and I thought the relationship issue was really nicely done and the little philosophy for crisis at the end was good, too. Keep breathing and see what the tide brings in...)

Ohhh, yeah, I love all of those quotes. You know, I have often asked myself if I have truely forgiven my husband. I wondered this because I still get so angry and disappointed sometimes (many times). It gets better with time, but sometimes it just hits me out of no where. I was doubting if I'd truely forgiven him yet. I thought that with forgiveness all the anger and hurt would go away. But it doesn't. But I realize now that I've forgiven him because I haven't "retaliated" or went out and deliberately try to hurt him by having an affair. Who would I really be hurting anyway? So yes, maybe I have forgiven him because I'm not obsessed with hurting him. I just always wanted him to KNOW how much he'd hurt me and to never let him forget it. (my H always asks me "do you really think I could EVER forget how much I hurt you?) I certainly hope not. And I also like the one about insanity...that's me!! In the past when I first found out I asked the same questions, over and over and over...the answers were always the same. I kept asking questions like "why?" all the time. Knowing that there would NEVER be an acceptable answer. I have finally stopped asking.<P>Comfort<P>------------------<BR>Remember the sunshine when the storm seems unending...

i like the castaway tide thing. guess i will have to go see it, H is working out of town, but i can go by myself. <P>happy_girl<BR>

I had never heard the one about "insanity" before and it fits me like a glove. Like Comfort said, I used to ask "why?" over and over again. But I stopped when my counsellor said exactly what Comfort said - there will never be a satisfactory answer.<P>But I still ask some other questions over and over again. Thanks Comfort for also clarifying in my mind whether I have forgiven my H. When I get angry with him these days, it is hurt more than a need for retaliation. It is the loss of so many hopes and dreams for us. It is the loss of what I thought was a perfect marriage. And it was finding out that he is a mere mortal and not the god that I made him out to be.<P>But I no longer want to get back at him for what he did, so I guess I have moved into the forgiveness level and the true recovery level.<P>I also agree with Happy-girl, I laughed out loud when I read that Castaway quote -- I have kept breathing and sometimes the tide has brought in some pretty wonderful things (along with seaweed!).<P>- Heavenly