Aaaaacccckkk! Flowerseed's right. I don't recognize this place! I hooked up last night and have spent several hours reading posts to catch up and I was stunned at what has been happening here. That being said, I am delighted we have a moderator...it kind of makes us 'official', does it not? But, most of all...how I have missed you all...Leelee, cdcollins, Heavenly, Flowerseed, Gregg, Happy Girl, Broken Wings, Middelman, Tigger, Jenny (how was your trip???), takingcare, Gemini, Zebra, Gabi, Ohbratti, aloneandsad, blue, K, Bystander et al. I see Terri and Bozos Deb are here from GQ II and I love that. Those compassionate oldtimers have so much to offer the newbies and give us all so much support. All the oldtimers here have their work cut out for them with the endless assaults the site is enduring from 'crashers'. And so many newbies, which saddens me, yet I am so grateful they have found this haven of love and support, comfort and advice...a place to unload their burdens and restore marriages.<P>As Jerry Garcia said, "What a long strange trip it's been." The move went well considering how looooong it has taken me to settle in. So many things to do. I found renter's for my house and am reaffirming with the mortgage people which may or may not work out because of the bank...we'll see. The house I live in is heaven. It isn't so much the house as it is just a basic house...no bells or whistles but it does have a great kitchen and the view is amazing. Every night around dusk, a herd of deer tromp through my yard and have successfully made the yard's arborvitaes into topiaries (hahaha) and from the moment I wake up until I go to sleep, the loons call to each other throughout the day. Loon calls has to be my favorite sound in all the world. <P>There are fox and piliated woodpeckers, wood ducks and I am surrounded by hundred foot white cedars and birch trees. The lake view looks like a Hamm's Beer commercial (for those of you old enough to remember them..."from the land of sky blue waters...waters..."<P>The people up here are wonderful...warm, friendly, quirky and interesting...kind of like Northern Exposure and the roads are windy and hilly where we are. The peaceful quiet is balm for the soul and we both sleep like the dead. Something that has eluded both of us for three years. <P>I am looking more relaxed, smile and laugh more, feel as though I am rekindling my damaged relationship with God and my husband and I are enjoying each other like never before.<P>Something has happened to my husband these past few months, even before the move. His medication has been a miracle drug. He no longer has the profound deep depression, no longer gives into rage, no longer has the reckless behavior and makes terrible decisions, nor is he ever unkind or hurtful. He has developed a new appreciation for me and for our marriage and is grateful for this amazing opportunity. A chance to heal...and it has been a true rebirth for both of us.<P>I do not agree with the crashers that once a cheater, always a cheater. I think the majority of us here are dealing with a "fluke" in our marraige and especially on this site, our husband's are not serial cheaters like the lurkers' husbands are/were. What happened to me will never happen again. As someone here said, our husbands are not likely to repeat something so devastating that impacts their lives forever and ruins the marriage and devastates us so. What my husband and I have found because of all this is something so incredible, I never in my wildest dreams ever thought it could be any better than it was before, but it is. I used to come here a lament "I want my life back before the A and before OC"...and strangely enough, I have it, only better, with a deeper and more intense understanding, compassion and cohesiveness that is such a gift...I admit I still wish with all my heart we could have attained this 'nirvana' without the OW/OC entering into the picture because my vanity and my ego craves and longs for the exclusivity. But, I am learning not to focus on it too much anymore and have evolved into an 'acceptance' phase in my recovery.<P>Dear Friends, I am so glad to be back for I have missed you all so much. I have many more posts to read and catch up on so I will be busy with that for a while. Thanks for caring so much and making me feel missed. <P>Love<P>Catnip =^^=<p>[This message has been edited by catnip (edited April 24, 2001).]

Welcome Back !<P>It sounds wonderful up there and I can really picture it since we were just near there (although it was very white in February) and have been near there for all of the seasons. Sounds like heaven, you deserve it.<P>I know exactly what you mean about your relationship being better than ever. I almost felt that immediately after D-day, that i did not want to go back to before the A. I just have to figure how to put unsolved issues away and let my mind and heart heal without knowing what I think I want to know.<P>Well, get reading Catnip, I have laid real low for the last couple weeks but have been reading - very interesting it was.<P>Enjoy the wonderful Spring (Minnesota is going to get one)up there, say Hi to the Loons for me!<P>Carrie<BR>

Dear, dear Catnip,<P>I am speechless with sheer joy at your return!<P>You have been sorely missed and we have needed your wisdom and your way with words so many times -- especially over the past few weeks.<P>Your new home sounds heavenly (or fit for heavenly -- how about an invitation??) I hope that your new location will bring you endless peace and happiness.<P>Have fun catching up on all the happenings. I am so looking forward to your wisdom and humour again.<P>love,<BR>heavenly<p>[This message has been edited by heavenlybody26 (edited April 24, 2001).]

I'll tip a Hamm's in honor of you (while listening to the Dead). I'm jealous of the pileated (woody) woodpeckers: we only have red heads, downy, and sapsuckers around here.<P>Glad that you're finding some peace!!!

Catnip you sound INCREDIBLE!!!<BR>I am sincerely happy for your joy, peace and renowned relationship with the Lord. I am not surprised though I knew it would happen momasita!!!<P>Glad to have you back girl, I think we have done a good job handling the fort but am I glad you are here again. I missed my friend so much and am so grateful to not only have you back but to have you back with renewed peace, strength, love, and respect.<P>Continued blessings to you and your hubby.<P>Love ya,<BR>Leelee

Hey Catnip!<P>I was so happy to see your post this morning! We have all missed you, and it will be great to read your posts again, and have you and Gregg bantering back and forth. You two always crack me up! I sent pictures of Abbi to Happy Girl, so you may want to email her. She changed the picture site, and can give you the info for getting to the new one. I believe she has everyone else's pics up now too.<P>Glad to have you back. I wish we could be there with you. I would love to watch the wildlife up there. Here, we have lots of birds, but the only animals that are wild here are the mongeese!<P>Love,<P>Tigger

Catnip,<BR>Welcome back! You have been sorely missed by one and all!<BR>cd

Hi there Catnip!!! So glad you are back! We really have missed you around here...all I could think when I first saw the intruders come here is "oooo I wish Catnip were here, she would claw them to pieces". But hopefully they are gone, at least for a little while.<P>Your new place sounds just perfect! I am so happy you are finding your peace with God. That really does make my heart soar. And peace with your H and M. There is a life out there afterall.<P>Love Ya Cat!<P>Broken_Wings

Catnip,<BR>Back just in time I see our insane ow is also back with another name. Good things in the wild wild woods are going so great. We have been having fun to hubby was shaking something at me threw the bushes I think it was a worm, I think I almost died. and look what we learned to do. Glad your back! with love flowerseed

Welcome back! You sound well. That is a good thing! <P>Carolyn

<BR>Welcome back, Catnip!<P>Bystander

Welcome back Catnip. I have missed you so. I am glad to hear about you and H and new place!<P>I'll be watching for you....<P>Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

Welcome back!

Welcome back, Catnip! I was just wondering to myself the other day where you were, if you were okay and that you would certainly be a big help to diffuse the situation on the board. <P>Glad to see things are going well and that you are settled. <BR>Now I'm singing "from the land of sky blue waters...waters......"

WELCOME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!<BR>

Well, I think everyone has missed you, Catnip! And I'm glad to see you back, too! We have had way too much fun in your absence, I'm afraid ... well, maybe fun is NOT the right word to use?<P>Anyway, WELCOME BACK! And glad you are settling in. And even MORE glad to hear that your husband is finding peace and that you both are doing so well!<P>As for my presence here - well, when I found out that there was trouble over here - I couldn't NOT come by and offer my support. I tried to bring the cavalry, too ... I think we did ok, right folks?<P>------------------<BR>terri<BR><B>Courage</B><P>Whatever course you decide upon,<BR>there is always someone to tell you<BR>that you are wrong.<P>There are always difficulties arising<BR>which tempt you to believe that your <BR>critics are right.<P>To map out a course of action <BR>and follow it to an end <BR>requires courage.<P><I>Ralph Waldo Emerson</I>

<B>Catnip =^^=</B><P>I am sorry it took me so long to get to this thread. How wonderful to see you again. Thanx for the update too.<P>Did you post on the long thread on GQII started by <B>New Begining</B> ? If not you really should. It's been quite a gas.<P>Hugs honey and glad you back here and posting.<P>Much love of course,<P>------------------<BR><B>God bless you and all of us. We are all going to make it, all of us! With God on our side we can't lose! What God has joined together let no man put asunder. <P>Samantha</B><p>[This message has been edited by A blessed Samantha (edited April 24, 2001).]

terri...you've done a GREAT job! Thanks.<P>And Catnip...again...welcome back, I've really missed you.<P>Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

welcome back dear catnip! you were missed tons. i am so happy for you that you are doing so well. you sound terrific. this move is what you needed. i am glad you are back here, it has been quite an emotional roller coaster here lately. i can barely keep up with everyone, and i am so glad we are finally ignoring our intruders! <P>did i say we missed you? and that i am so glad you are back?? LOL. meow....hiss<P>happy_girl

What a warm wonderful welcome (sniff)...you guys are wonderfully purr-fect. There's a MB Weekend planned for the weekend of the May 18 & 19 in Minneapolis but it is sooo expensive. I would love to go just to meet some of the forum members and attend some of the seminars but alas, no cash. Maybe I'll hang out outside the building and smoke cigarettes and watch for nametags. (I don't smoke anymore...much)<P>Carriemom: I didn't know you were still here and lurking! I was going to call you next week just to check up on you. What have you heard, if anything? Still quiet? Is that good, or unnerving? How are you and J doing? You do sound pretty centered...<P>Heavenly: Hey. It's an open invitation. I've got the pot on (coffee!!!!) and ready at all times.<P>K: Aha! I thought so! You ARE old enough to remember those commercials. Hahahaha. But, I bet like others in our age group, you have put away the tie-dyed for one of those pricey Jerry Garcia neck ties to make a statement at work, n'est pas? A true dead-head. I raise a spoonful of Cherry Garcia in your honor. BTW, have you ever noticed that those piliated woodpeckers are eerily akin to terradactyls? Distant relative I am sure. Their call is very prehistoric as well. Creepy.<P>Leelee, buddy-buddy. How many churches have taken out extra insurance since your candle burning has gone from the sublime to the excessive? Hahaha. I know you've been praying for me because I can feel it. Besides, one cannot drive down these forest roads and walk in these woods and not feel a connection with God. Leelee, I'm not angry (with God) anymore. I have a new e-mail address and will write to you tomorrow and send it onto you.<P>Tigger: Happy Girl e-mailed me the new information and I will logon to see your new beauriful daughter. How is Abbi doing? Is she a good baby and cries only when hungry or wet and lets you sleep through the night yet? How are you feeling? I miss bantering with Gregg. I feel as though I need a good round with Gregg to sharpen my skills, however, being gone so long, I've lost some of my edge.<P>Broken Wings: You've all done a great job at making the intruders into catfood, however, I truly believe it is better to take away their power by not responding...and, oooh, it is so hard not to because of the buttons they push and the somewhat perverted enjoyment we (I-I should only speak for myself) get at unloading and venting on them when they dare show their ugly persona. It is hard not to react and view them as our own OW. But, apparantly you have all been successful at both getting in some licks and still eventually diffusing the situation. Now that we have a moderator to keep us in check and lock annoying threads, we may be better able to adhere to the principles.<P>Flowerseed: You must be into a 'worm' thing lately as I read in one of your posts where you expressed awe at the potential talent of someone's WS of having the ability to stretch his 'worm' across a couple states! You must be doing heavy garden duty getting those beds ready for seed...all those worms!<P>Terri: Personally, I have always appreciated members from GQ II coming here to reinforce or to offer advice. I know if I were not at this site in the forum, I would be drawn to it a little like watching parimedics at an accident scene...something where your heart reaches out to comfort and understand and yet ever so grateful it ain't me laying there. I suppose this is one thing that the others on GQ II fear most and are drop to their knees grateful this horror did not happen to them, knowing full well it certainly could have. Oh, but for the grace of God. At first I was afraid no one from the other sites on the forum would ever come here, that we would be forever isolated from the others because our situation is just too awful to face and because they would view this as a place where the "crud" could rub off on them somehow...like typhoid, measles, mumps, chicken pox, scarlet fever...the plague. And yet, you don the armor and go into battle for us, calling the calvary and fighting the eeee-vil intruders on our behalf. I thank you for your non-judgmental support respecting that not all of us can accept an OC....like me. I love having you and Deb here and whenever I get a moment I go to GQ and read your posts. I know a lot about your situation and have kept up and am disappointed at the outcome for you. I had such high hopes when you and your husband had to ride together on the motorcycle on that long trip to the family gathering (funeral?) and being together for all that time. I was hoping something would connect for you two.<P>Samantha: I have not had a chance to get to GQ and read anything there, but I will check out New Beginning's thread as soon as I get through this backlog of reading here. Catching up is an awesome task!<P>Happy Girl: Catfood! I will send you my new e-mail address tomorrow. I don't have AOL anymore; can't get it here and I am having a tough time figuring out how to make it around the internet without it. You sound good, too, Happy Girl. When I left a few weeks ago, I must admit I was concerned about you...you seemed to drop out for a while and I was afraid you weren't coming back. I know you keep in touch with Babstr..how is she doing? Does she lurk? Give her my love.<P>Bystander: I love ya<P>Raskal, Ohbratti, cd, JTigger, takingcare and Gem, dear Gem...I missed you all, too and I am so glad to hear from all of you. And cd, I got your e-mail and will read your posts to catch up and will write you tomorrow...<P>Is anyone going to Minneapolis for the MB Weekend?<P>Catnip =^^= <p>[This message has been edited by catnip (edited April 24, 2001).]