K,<BR>I have a couple of questions that may sound facetious, but I mean them very seriously.<P>You seem to be so good at keeping a level head no matter what the situation is. Don't you ever get to the point where you feel like screaming and yelling and throwing a fit? Do you ever get really really mad, like at the om, for instance? Most of the time I am able to keep calm and in control, but sometimes I just lose it completely. What is your secret for staying so rational all of the time?<P>-cd

I mutter a lot, wear a trenchcoat backwards with nothing on underneath, and flap my arms wildly...<P> <P>Actually, I used to get angry and judgemental a lot. Honestly, that's what helped to destroy my marriage. When I realized what those emotions (and the acting out of them did), I was horrified. I had very good help from Steve Harley on learning "appropriate" behaviors---the right ways to express myself when I get angry. <P>Now when I do get angry (which is much less often), I do so by myself (and yes, I have screamed bloody murder in the car at times, all by myself). Or I take it out on the kids... <P>If you feel yourself losing control, inform the person who you're about to dump on that this is going to happen, and that you need to (walk away? scream? whatever works) for a minute or two.<P>I find it easier to keep my cool on a bulletin board. I've had times where I've written tremendous posts---and then never sent them. Because they were mean spirited, or written in anger. If only my mouth had a delete key, and a nice queue to store stuff before it came out...<P>

Uppie!