Our xOW has a three syllable name. I don't want to use her real name here, so let's just say it's "Timberly" for example. She likes her full name and refuses to answer to any shortened versions, like "Tim" for example. So, I nicknamed her "TimberButt."<P>I even have some songs I've written. I play them on the piano and howl them at the top of my lungs. Sometimes H even joins me on the chorus. Here's one:<P>TimberButt Oh TimberButt<BR>Such a, such a smelly sl*t<BR>Oh-oh-oh Timber, TimberButt<P>Then this one goes to the kid's song "Frog Went A-courtin"<P>Miss TimberButt is e-evil, uh-huh uh-uh<BR>She's evil in the night time, evil in the day, <BR>She tried to steal Mr. Job away, uh-huh, uh-uh<P>Miss TimberButt is e-evil, uh-huh uh-uh<BR>She's mean, she's bad, she's oh so bad,<BR>She's even slept with her own grandad, uh-huh, uh-huh<P>Miss TimberButt is e-evil, uh-huh, uh-huh<BR>Now she's in Tulsa crying boo-hoo, <BR>She's cries when she cleans up baby poo, boo-hoo boo-hoo<P>I know, I know. I have the maturity of a six-year-old, but hey you take humor and a laugh anywhere you can get it nowadays.<P>MJ<P><p>[This message has been edited by Mrs. Job (edited August 24, 2001).]

Gee, Mrs. J, I don't really have a consistant nickname for ow. It's kind of funny, because h and I never actually call her by name. Mostly, I guess I use her last name. Sometimes I call her "Slutface" and h sometimes just calls her "Ugly".<P>However....I do confess to some creative lyric warping. You know Natalie Merchant's song "Jealousy"? That was on the radio ALL THE TIME during the affair, and I would about go out of my mind when I heard it. I mean, talk about "strumming my pain with a song". And I couldn't avoid it, I was driving an hour to work then and there was nothing to do but listen to the radio. So finally, I came up with my own lyrics. I would shout them at the top of my lungs to drown out the real version...except for the end part where she sings, "Accidently do you say MY name...?" <P>Those with fragile eyes, disregard the rest of this post. <P>"Jealousy" -the cdcollins version<P>"Is she a slut...that gives head?<BR>Are there many many guys that she pleases?<BR>Is she the sort...that your mother said<BR>would giiiiive you diseases?<P>Is she a whore...do you pay her well?<BR>How many others f*** her, can you tell?<BR>I'd like to know...how do you stand the smell?<BR>Oh, I hooooope she burns in hell."<P>Ok, so it aint Shakespeare. <BR>-cd

sl*t dog bit*h. It's the only thing I have ever called her. I never use her real name.

ok, i wish we had something clever. But I just refer to her as your baby's mama. It probably is a love buster, but darn, that's what she is, right? In our culture that phrase has very negative connotations. It emphasizes that the child was born out of wedlock.<P>My husband "respectfully" refers to her by Miss (Her Last Name Here). I hate that. Like she deserves a respectful title.<P>Now in arguements and heated discussions, I've referred to her with some very colorful words. Most are not appropriate to write here. Those of you who instant message with me know the wonderful things I call her!<P><P>------------------<BR>Zebra Baby ...<P>Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Ha! Ha! I USED to call her fat bit** whore. And spandex slut. Now I just say "she" or "her" or her name. I don't honestly care anymore. She's a very sore loser. I didn't even know she was competing with me.<P>Love<BR>Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

PSYCO BABBLE!!!!<P>A well deserved name. Fits to the T. OW likes to talk a lot and speaks with a forked tongue. Sweet to H and full of hate to me. She twists her conversations and often rewrites them in the play back mode. Then she reads inbetween the lines even when there is no text. <P>Ex: H makes a comment to her that he thinks she is a nice person. OW takes that not just as a compliment but that she is nicer than me. With me, when I said to OW, listen lady, her comment was 'that's right, I'm a lady and you're not.' Because I don't have a college degree (but do work as an operational manager where a degree is normally required), that I must be illiterate and dumb. Oh I can go on but I don't want to bore you all with her endless babbling. <P>Suffice to say, the name fits. There are other choice ones here but this is a 'family site'. HA HA!!!! <P>L.<P>

I cant participate..No swear words aloud

I usually only read but this time I'll post. I call mine floppy tw*t. floppy for short. <BR>

I refer to H's one-night stand as "STD Tramp". Too bad I never got to call her that to her face, since she died before H finally admitted to his fling with her.<P>The last one is just Cafe Woman, although I have considered changing it to Cafe Broad. I guess I can be generous enough not to call her anything worse, since she has never harassed me or done anything (after the initial little catty remark which clued me in) other than call our business a couple of times with some pretext of getting H to do some work at her restaurant. Naturally, I told her that he didn't have time to do it, and then "forgot" to tell him that she called.

Let's see...<P>stupid slut and plainer than jane<P><BR>My H prefers not to talk about her at all but<BR>when he does it is "the warthog" (which leads me<BR>to obsess about how he could do it to begin with)<BR>She is one of those bag over the head kind of "women"<P>Loved your songs Mrs J and Cd!!!

Well, I call her "Tuna". Can't really remember why. Been calling her that for the past 10 years now. Even she knows that I call her that. There are times that I call her names that would make a sailor blush, but not often.<P>My H just refers to her as "my baby's mama" or "Tuna".<P>

Well I have a few, SLug being number 1, but in a pinch ditch pig works as well or just plain uglier than sh**, never will I speak her name but man she is ugly