Well, here's a brief summary of recent events:<P>H and I arranged with C&Y for our first four hour visit to take place from noon to four last sunday. Remember that this was to be the first time that we would be taking oc alone for 2 hours away from grandmother's house. We brought along our two youngest children so that oc could meet them for the first time. we got to the grandmother's house and knocked on the door. No answer, although we could hear them moving around inside. So we sat down and waited on the front porch steps for 10-15 minutes. Finally, oc apparantly broke free and ran to the door and tried to open it herself. At this point, grandma too came to the door and said "You're not supposed to be here until 3 o'clock." We told her that C&Y arranged for us to come at noon. Grandmother said, "They haven't told me that. I have physical custody and I decide when you see oc". I said, "look, we have just driven 2 and a half hours to visit with oc, and we've been waiting here for fifteen minutes in 90 degree weather with our little boys. Even if C&Y didn't tell you we'd be here at this time, don't you think we could come in and visit now anyway, at least for a little while?" She said, "Oc is NOT ready to see you yet" and shut the door right in my 2 year old's face. All this time, oc was straining to get out the door, because she caught sight of the boys and wanted to come out and meet them. <P>It turned out that the C&Y caseworker HAD forgotten to update grandmother on the time change, but still, we ended up driving 2 and a half hours back home without visiting oc at all that day. The visit has officially been rescheduled for this coming sunday. I'm looking forward to our first unsupervised time with oc, but dreading going through more of grandmother and ow's hostility. It makes things so very hard. They still have not told oc that h is her father, so we'll be doing that during our two unsupervised hours on Sunday. Hopefully, we will find the right words to tell her.<P>It was so sad for us to see oc peeking out the window as we drove away, knowing that she couldn't possibly understand why we came to the door and then left without even speaking to her. Especially since I had PROMISED her that she could hold our baby next time we saw her. I don't know what ow and grandmother think they're going to accomplish by continuing to act so nasty to us.<P>In other topics: I didn't take the job at our lawyer's office because it didn't pay enough to merit daycare expenses. However I have just gotten an offer to join a local university as adjunct faculty teaching accredited computer classes part time for them. It's the same thing I'm doing now, but with a lot more pay. I have to give them a presentation on Monday, and as long as I don't totally screw that up, the job is mine.<P>By the way, bonniebb/suzy, I am one of those women who does fully participate in visitation with my husband. I'm completely supportive of him in our quest to incorporate the oc into our family. However, ow is not and never will be a factor in that. She is not even allowed to be present when we visit with oc. She is a total nonentity as far as I am concerned, as all ow should be. Our only problem is that the ow doesn't want us involved and is fighting it every step of the way. She wants my h to be the father financially, but doesn't want him to "play daddy" to "her" daughter. well, that's just tough, because h and I are good people, we truly care about oc, and since ow is a total screw up, we'll eventually end up with custody of oc. What I don't think you understand, my dear ow in disguise, is that women like me are your worst nightmare. You think it's tough on the ow whose mm aren't allowed to participate in oc's life - you ought to see how hard it is on our ow watching her daughter fall in love with me, the wife.<P>-cd<P>

CD, i'm so so sorry that C&Y forgot to notify the wicked grandma of the west you were coming early. I do hope that once you sweep little darling out of there next Sunday the day will go as smoothly as you'd hoped.<P>I feel soooooo very sorry for that poor girl. She is truely being mentally abused by that family. It's amazing they don't realize the damage they are doing to her vulnerable mind.<P>I just picture her in that aweful house one day (before you win full custody of her), laying in her bed so sad that she can't be with you. God I pray that C&Y does the right thing and quick. I can't imagine her missing that life she's living now.<P>Did you mention to the case worker what happened when you showed up?? What did they think of the Evil Grandmother's behaviour?<P>Great news about the job. I hope all goes well. Things are very well at home with me. All of your prayers helped.<P>Keep you head up and fighting the good fight. I'm so proud of you.<P>Z.<P>------------------<BR>Zebra Baby ...<P>Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

My Dear CD,<P>How awful for you guys...man...what nasty little witchs they are. So sad to be that full of anger. So pathetic.<BR>I am so glad for that little girl that she has you adn your H to be her knights in shining armour. I am praying for you and your family and especially Darling.<P>Love<BR>bw

Dearest CD,<P>I am so sorry that these bad apples are getting into your bushel again. I was hoping that you'd had a wonderful day with Darling. I was happy to read that she was so anxious to see you. Maybe our prayers are being answered, and God is protecting her mind from what OW and OW mother are trying to feed her about you and H. I will pray for you on Sun, that God gives you the right words when you tell her about H being her father. When you do get her alone, just relax and enjoy all the wonderful moments I know you will have.<P>Congrads on the new job. I will pray for you on Mon. What type of presentation do you need to give them? <P>Again, I will pray that things go smoothly, both on Sun and Mon. Let us know what happens!<P>Love,<P>Tigger

Dear Cd, <P>I am sorry to hear that ow and her mother are still causing problems for you and your h. Report this latest incident to the case worker. Can't these two low class individual see the damage they are doing to this child? I do hope you and your h get custody of this child for the child's sake, if this is what you want. This child can't be raise by this two crazy people.<P>You and your family are in my prayers.<P>By the way good luck this Monday with your new job. I know you will give a good presentation. Let us know how it goes!<P>love,<BR>mina

Gee, I'm begining to wonder if we need to get together and send you a care package of holy water, stakes and a mallet, silver bullets, a cross, a bible, rabies vaccine, and a bullet proof vest for the visits. These people are unreal !<P>You keep doing what you are doing. I honestly believe this child can only benefit from you being in her life. <P>(Besides we all know it bugs the snot out of ow and that is worth something ! Let her deal with someone intruding on her life , she was happy enough to intrude on yours ! Sorry feeling a little evil today.)

cd,<BR>You and your family are in my prayers today. How heartbreaking for all of you and little Darling.<BR>May God watch over you today and grant you peace where this matter is concerned.<BR>love<BR>Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

Prayers to you, your family and Darling.<BR>May it be resolved soon.<BR>J