Anyway I am here again. Things between me and h still lingering around up in the air. Sometime I just wish this is all a nightmare and that one day I would just wake up and this would all be over. I just want things to go back to the way they were. Why did he have to go out there and fool around and get her pregnant.<P>I feel even worse because I lost my first two pregnancies to miscarriage and still birth. <P>One day h and I were arguing and of all the things to say he said that I should not worry about anything because I don't have any children for him. So I said that go to OW and f... her and let here bear another friging c for you.<P>He apologized later, but the thought of him saying that just tears me up inside. I have decided that I will never have another c for my h because he does not deserve it.<P>I want to give him an ultamatium me of the c. You can not have us both. OW calls me sometimes and talks shi. Says she wants him back. So I went on her job and ask her to talke shi. now, she did not say a word.<P>H says that he is sorry for what he did and wants us to move forward, but how can I if he will always want to see the oc.<P>We don't have any kids yet, so why should I want to be around someone elses'.<P>I love him but I want to be happy.<P>Sometimes I just feel as if he has his cake and eating it too.<P>Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.<P>Lakelle

Lakelle:<P>Have you and your husband tried marriage counseling? If not, I'd suggest that you give the MB office a call (888-639-1639) and schedule an appointment with either Steve or Jenn Harley. They're both terrific, and may be able to help you sort things through.<P>Based on your situation, you might want to strongly consider divorce. You have no children with your husband, and if he's unwilling to stay away from the OC and OW---I see no real reason for you to put yourself in this damaging situation. It's very rare that I suggest divorce, but this is one of these cases in which I think it ought to be considered.<P>

Lakelle, I am so sorry. I wish I could give you a big hug.<BR> with love flowerseed

Lakelle you have recieved sound advice from K. Bless you in your decision.<BR>love<BR>Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

Lakelle,<BR>I'm so sorry for your pain. Some of us here can relate to your pregnancy losses, and I'm not the only one (I've lost 4 of my 6 pregnancies). <P>As for divorce, that is a difficult decision of course. Some women I've read about on these boards in the 2 years I've been here have also not had children w/H. I recall some of those stayed together but did not see the OC. I can only think of one situation where the couple has no kids together, sees the OC, AND stayed together. I don't think I could do it, but then I did not think I would ever stay with a spouse after he cheated and I was wrong. No one really knows your situation but you. No one knows how much you and your man have been through together before now that was POSITIVE, whether the love is worth the pain. Are you better off with him or without him? <P>Best wishes and Godbless,<BR>Jenny, in recovery 3+years

sending you a hug, Lakelle...I lost two babies, it is painful.<BR>Sending more hugs your way....<BR>twiisty

Lakelle,<P>Wanted to add my prayers for you.<P>So sorry about all your losses. Words cannot express<BR>my sadness. <P>Take care, fluke

SO SORRY FOR YOUR PAIN!!<BR>H's say some awful things in arguments (we alldo)<BR>but you did nothing wrong ...he did!!!<BR>without children, you can move on move away start over, have cmplete closure find someone new worthy of you<BR>BUT....only you can decide if you want to be together or get a divorce.<BR>