<p>[ October 26, 2001: Message edited by: mnca6713julia3 ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Bonniebb:
<strong>And honestly, PLEASE answer me because I asked it in the previous post and you ingored it. What DO you do when H makes bad decisions or harms you? What are women in that situation supposed to do according to you?</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Simple, when h makes a bad decision, pray.
And this is not according to me, but according to God.<p>If thou wilt not observe to do all the words of this law that are written in this book, that thou mayest fear this glorious and fearful name, THE LORD THY GOD.<p>Deuteronomy 28:58

"The Power of a Praying Wife" by Stormy Omartian
Quote p. 13
"First of all, let me make it perfectly clear that the power of a praying wife is not a means of gaining control over your husband, so don't get your hopes up! In fact, it is quite the opposite. It's laying down all claim to power in and of yourself, and relying on GOD'S power to transform you, your husband, your circumstances, and your marriage. This power is not given to wield like a weapon in order to beat back an unruly beast. It's a gentle tool of restoration appropriated through the prayers of a wife who longs to DO right more than BE right, and to give LIFE more than GET EVEN. It's a way to invite God's power into your husband's life for his greatest blessing, which is ultimately yours, too"<p>I recommend this book to any woman who is looking for help, peace of mind, or to feel like they are doing something for their marriage. In my situation, it has been one of the few things I CAN control in this madness of a life. And, believe it or not, I am actually starting to see the results. <p>But, please don't misinterpret my words, I believe that I have changed more than my H. I do see changes in him, but they are sooooo slooowwww [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] The Lord tells me that He speaks to me because H is not listening [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] So women, I pray, I pray, I pray. But not for me and my wishes, but for the Lord's plan and guidance and direction to be clear so that I may fulfill my destiny and be at peace. <p>I am sorry if I have rambled. I am NOT a religious fanatic, but this experience has deepened my faith in Him and my spirituality as a human being. Oh and Jenny, if your reading this, I am beginning to see the light!!!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Bonniebb:
<strong>You are SCARY!
You may have been created for MAN but I was not.
What about women who never marry?
Why were they created?
I find this so ridiculous.
Let me guess, you are against divorce too? What would you do if your H hit you? Would you pray for him?</strong><hr></blockquote><p>For the Lord, the God of Israel, saith I hateth putting away...<p>Malachi 2:16<p>Again, Genesis 2 is clear why women were created.<p>If my h hit me, yes I would most certainly pray for him. I wouldn't stay where I was in danger, , but it wouldn't stop me from praying.
God raised the dead, and he can certainly, undoubtedly change hearts, behaviors, attitudes.
God has the blueprint to our souls, not us. Remember, we marry for better, for worse; not for better, for better.<p>God Bless you all and may he look upon us favorably as we struggle to ask the Holy Spirit to present His word according to him and not according to us.<p>[ October 26, 2001: Message edited by: mnca6713julia3 ]</p>

BrokenWings,
I HAD to come here just to say to you - you don't scare me even a little. NO ONE insulted "your God" You are the disturbed one my friend!

And all this Bible talk is a frightening! Just because SOMEONE wrote something in a Bible, doesn't mean a thing! AND, not everyone subscribes to your religious thinking.

I'm sorry, but I became a member and posted because of all the pain I've been experiencing and hoped to find "support" from cyber friends. I could care less about all the bickering between some of you. I was under the impression that this forum was for support, advice & help through difficult times. Prayer is a fabulous thing...let's not argue about some things. I know that I am in a great deal of pain because of my H having an affair and producing OC, I don't want to read posts where people are bickering back & forth about people's religious thoughts. Let's give each other support in these times of great pain & stress. Thank you!

Millsc1, Here, here to you. Well put, and Thank you, I was just going over this entire thread, and the first thought that came to my mind was hey wait a minute what happened to Millsc1, she started this post looking for support, and the whole thread has gotten carried away and missed her original post. My marriage has been in recovery for over three years and we now have regular visitation with the oc. The xow fought us all the way and it took some time, but she can not dictate where, when or with whom your h is with during his visits. I would love to give you some further insight, but right now I am pressed for time and I will return and get into more details with you. Stay well, Peace, Gabi1116

And please forgive me for my part in the deviation of the thread. I was trying to help at first, and then it got kind of ... off track...<p>Again, I am sorry.

To one and all<p>This thread has been brought to my attention along with a couple of other ones.<p>First let me guide you to the Rules & Policies we all agree to when we register with the Marriage Builders Message Discussion Forum.<p>There is also another rule on the Marriage Builders site about disrespectful judgments in a marriage. I believe that rule applies here as well. <p>Everyone is an individual and free to voice their own personal opinions, as long as (and this point is very important) we don't disrespect someone else's opinion, convictions or feelings. This thread has gotten off topic and contains some very disrespectful judgments. <p>Please everyone, can't we play nice? <p>Concentrate on using these boards for their intended purpose, which is to Build Marriages! It is not a place to argue, hurt or be cruel to someone. Hasn't each member on this site experienced that enough in our personal lives without imposing it on another valued member of this site?<p>In advance I would like to thank you for your attention, consideration and cooperation of this matter.

gabi1116<p>Thanks for the message. Anytime the OW is out of H's life it's because some of you are lucky enough to have H's that don't want anymore contact w/OW. Supposedly my H says the same thing, however, he continues to talk to OW when he's at OW's parent's house visiting OC. Anytime he needs to make different arrangement re: visitation, instead of calling OW in front of me, he waits 'til he sees her at work and then talks. Yet H wonders why I don't trust him!! Why he lets OW control him I'll never know. I've tried to make him see that OW is the one being a jerk about things not me...but so far nothing has sunk in. She has no problem w/him having contact as long as OC is nowhere around me. H lets her get away w/that. Then he wants to know why I cry or why I moved out. I've been out for a month and nothing has changed yet - maybe soon I'll be able to grasp reality and realize that my H will always allow OW to rule his life because she gave him what he's always wanted! But yet he tells me how much he loves me and wants our marriage to work - what a crock! I wish 'd wake up soon and see that I'm probably just wasting my time. But how can I stop my heart from loving this man so much?? Thanks for listening! Take care.