It is going on 3 weeks since my WF A ended. I am the BF. Dealing with this is diffcult because I still have constant thoughts about what happened. I feel sad about the lies he told. About the things I actualy believed and that I didn't see it coming. And also that when I did, I was an emotional wreck. Didn't act as wisely as I should've. LB a lot. SO I feel guilt about that too. I understand that the A is something that partly I am responsible for because I wasn't meeting WF needs. Also I am a FWF.

Though I'm learning so much I'm stilll hurt. On top of this I think he is still very vulnerable, and I don't think he feels like he can trust me. I was an emotional wreck when it happened and LBed a lot. I made some wrong moves. WF may feel I will get highly upset if he tries to confide in me. He seemed to feel like he could trust OW.

I feel some guilt and incompetence for not making better moves(decisions). He is somewhat open to discussing POJA. But he has a limited fuse for how much he would like to discuss. Recently he denied my request to listen to POJA. That made me concerned because I know he will need to understand it to work on this and not to regress.
If any insight please share. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

You have posted on a board that doesn't get used very often. That would explain why you have no responses yet.

I would recommend you post your inquiry again on Emotional Needs or General Questions II.

But there are two things in your post that confused me. Those were the abreviations: WF and BF. I figure that they might be wayward friend and betrayed friend. As in your significant other (SO) has been having an affair outside your relationship.

So, I do recommend that you post on one of those two boards - especially the General Questions board.