Dear folks: I posted a rather LONG intro yesterday, and I'm sorry to have been so wordy. Amazingly, after almost 6 months of silence from this EOW, DH came home and told me last night that he'd heard that she is moving to TEXAS (we live in Oregon) and that her last day is tommorrow (today)!!<p>I have to admit I'm almost fainting with relief. This has been a hard road. She is completely unwilling to negotiate with us or with mediation, she wants DH to go off with her or she won't play, it seems. I can understand how difficult this is for her, but it was DH's choice to have no contact with OC (she assured him it was impossible to get pg, then she insisted she was doing this on her own and wanted nothing, etc). Now she has completely changed her mind and gone after the marriage, him, and especially me whom she DOES NOT EVEN KNOW
I am confused and scared but also hopeful that this might mean that she is trying to move on and build a good life on her own and give up trying to make more trouble for us

Hi Trying,<p>Welcome to our board. I didn't post yesterday becasue I didn't have any advice and didn't know what to say. I'm glad exOW is moving out of the state it will help you repair your marriage. Your preg. with H child right? Good luck and I hope everything works out. I hope you get a few more replies.<p>
Unsure

Dear Liisa,
Good news. Ow sometimes THINK a child will take the man away from years of love and honesty with a wife. It almost never happens.<p>How they could think it is beyond me. Usually when the fog lifts the H sees W for the good loving true woman she has always been. Right before his eyes stands his Bride forever. The woman God gave to him to honor and cherish. H will come back all together and be miserable at the pain he has caused someone who only loved him.<p>Then the romance begins again.<p>H will begin to cherish you more and more for staying when you could have left.<p>For honoring your marriage vows of "for better or for worse"...and this is one of those worse times.<p>The knowledge that he dropped his drawers for another will cause heartache. It causes them heartache when they realize it. <p>It is but a fleeting moment in time though. Long forgotten with God's help. Pray together. Go to church together. It is amazing how God turns what the devil has helped to do into peace in your lives again.<p>As far as oc I've read where it's chic to be a single parent these days on another thread..so feel no guilt, God will handle that too.<p>May the blessings of our Lord touch all couples trying to heal from this devastation tonight.<p>love
Debi

Dear new friends: THANKS for the lovely supportive posts. Yes, this baby is most miraculously DH's and mine together---after the horrible mess, 2 miscarriages, his affair/OC, many unsucessful fertility treatments, etc, this was a spontaneous conception of twins. Lost one at about 7 weeks and the other little boy is thriving, I'm now 28 weeks. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>I really, truly hold myself and DH responsible for the difficult times we created together, and although I am not feeling any affection for the EOW, I do feel a good deal of empathy and compassion for her situation and her pain. She chooses to believe that I am standing in the way of her happiness, when the truth is that DH would never be with her even if I were completely out of the picture. I guess I also spent some time focusing on HER instead of placing the responsibility for my DH's behavior on HIM.<p>love,
Liisa