it seems from your post to dixiechick that you are in favor of adoption when it is the w who has wondered and become pregnant. as you may have read i am in that very same situation. if you have had some experience in this area i would be greatly interested in hearing your views and your position on the topic. looking forward to your reply. if you need some background i have been posting here since october 2001.

hi pops. half brother(on dad's side) raised with other siblings. treated well I might add. however, he knew from the git go that he didn't belong to both parents. he was never able to accept himself somehow, he carried this emotional baggage for life. I truly believe that it would have been better for him to have been raised in an orphanage than in home with rest of sibings. I think he might have felt on equal footing. this is just speculation mind you, but some reflection might cause one to at least consider this. If he could have been adopted by a loving family Im sure his idea of himself would have been much better. I know of some friends who are adopted and are well adjusted and have great adoptive parents. they are the lucky ones. those who adopt do so from a loving motivation. why else adopt?
unless one deeply wants a child to love. pops you come accross as a very decent guy also, one who is more in touch with the real world than many. what I mean by that, is that you think in terms of what is, as opposed to what you might like it to be. I believe all too many listen to our societies idea of what life should be rather than what is. and when they attempt to follow those unrealistic ideas they fall flat on their face. not only hurting themselves, but those whose lives they share. I believe what ever path you chose it will work out well because you will make it work out well and in everyones best interests . God bless you and yours