<p>[ February 14, 2002: Message edited by: mnca6713julia3 ]</p>

Also, i think by actually typing this out...it will give me the strength i need to actually walk out the door and get on the plane. I am going to need a lot of strength on Sunday.

Julia,<p>I will be praying for you. I understand your not wanting to be in MN...I too told my H that I want to move the heck out of Louisiana...I can't stand this state and it's twisted laws and all the politics that goes on here...(But that's another thread....heh heh.....) let's just say I would move back to my adopted homestate (TEXAS) in a heartbeat! I don't even like breathing the same air as OW does in this stinky, swampy state... [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Have you and your H had any type of counseling? Have you and your H looked over any of the Marriagebuilders books etc.??? Could you plan B. for a while in MN to ascertain the situation? I think in your case the OW would be thrilled and your leaving and Plan B'ing from CA actually could hurt your chances of recovery with H. (these are my thoughts and I'm thinking out loud...please understand!) I'm in this for your health and happiness and for you and your H to get back together if that is what you both want!<p>I will definately be praying for wisdom and discernment for you. I know you are in pain, as we all are here in some form or fashion.<p>I just don't want you to give your OW the satisfaction of thinking she "won" by default because you took yourself out of the state. I think that by your being further away it could hinder to a degree.<p>Wish I were closer so I could be by to pray with you and help you through this... a good cup of coffee, hot tea, cocoa, _______________(your choice) does wonders at time with a good friend and prayer partner...<p>I'll be e-mailing you shortly...been thinking of you and H and praying for you daily, even if it doesn't seem like it...(hard to do alot of things with four kids home on Christmas break and an 8 month old pulling himself up on the tree! arrrggggghhhhh!!!)<p>I hope to hear from you soon too, when you are not too busy!!!<p>Hugs,
Twiisty
WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS...WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS...WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS...WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS...

Julia,
I am so sorry that your husband doesnt have any "fog" lights to see reality. I tend to agree somewhat with twiisty that maybe plan "B" should be close enough so that when he does come to his senses, he can immediately reach your door step. Have you written a plan B letter to him so he knows that you will be waiting when he "wakes" up? I am and will continue to pray for you and that your h will see what is right in front of his face. Good luck and keep us updated!

Julia,<p>I dont have much time right now...I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and praying for you.<p>Im not sure it really matters where you plan B. I personally would want to be where I am surrounded by support instead of feeling lonely. It has got to be a hard decision.........one I havent yet had to make. Things arent going well over here and I am getting sick of stuff allthough it really doesnt have anything directly to do with ow/oc. Maybe we could move to a state together and get away from all of them...........sometimes I just cant stand them.......any of them........<p>Love and Prayers<p>bw

Twiist, Tryin, BW,<p>Thanks for the input. Unfortunately, i have to fly standby and i just got off the phone with United Airlines and all the flights heading into Southern California are overbooked. But it looks like Monday is wide open so i will leave Monday (Christmas Eve morning) if all goes as planned. <p>Today my h told me that he is not driving me to the airport. I said, "oh yes you are", and he seriously said, "no..i'm not". I must admit that this is the h that i love, the one who puts his foot down about the 'right' things in life. I feel loved and wanted... but inevitably, i guess i will have to get a taxi on Monday [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] .<p>On Christmas Eve, my family party is always so much fun and we all have such a good time together. Someone, usually my dad or one of my uncles dresses up as Santa and comes through the door with presents for all the kids (i am still considered one of the kids - all my cousins range from 10 mo - 29 years old. I keep thinking that if i stay...major depression and uncertainty/sadness - the usual...or i could go home and at least take advantage of the one day of Christmas fun.<p>Oh, it was kind of sad, my h told me that he needs me, that he is strongest when i am around. I told him that he just felt more pressure when i am around. I again asked him if he would move with me to CA before April (due date month) and he just gave me the same old run around.<p>Just venting, thanks for listening.<p>God bless you all,
Julia

See my post to your "punch" topic. I posted to the wrong one...sorry! [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]