I have finally gotten to the point where I can honestly say, with no hard feelings, that I don't love my husband anymore. It takes a lot to push a person to that point. He talks to me in an insulting way, telling me I am stupid, I am a jerk or a b**ch, <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> telling me I am a bad mother and a bad wife. Let me tell you a little about him. My husband is a probationer (he finishes in March)and it is hard for him to get a decent job with his record - I understand that - and he works part time late nights for $6 and hour. I make about double and work fulltime during the day. He goes to school, so he is trying to make the effort to better our life, but only financially. I cannot stand the way he talks to me. And he tells my one year old son that I am a bad mother and a bad person. Anytime I need anything outside of medical attention, he tells me how bad I am and how selfish I am, but it's ok for him to get new computer speakers that cost $800, and a software program that cost $250. My sister borrowed my car last Thanksgiving when we were out of town and had a wreck (not her fault). The insurance called it a total and sent me the check, roughly $3,500. I told him that $500 we could send to the credit card people, but the other $3,000 I needed for my downpayment. Well, that just really sent him over the edge. He kept me up for hours at night after he got home telling me how bad I was and calling me cruel names. I just happened to call him from my parents house a few days later and he told me he had sent all of that to the credit people. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> He didn't want me to have a car, which I really need because I have twins on the way. Well, I went to the bank and had it stopped and I froze the account. I had told him the night before that I didn't want him to send all of the money to the credit people, nd he did it anyway. I pulled out the cash in a cashier's check payable to me. I headed out to the house to get my stuff and my son's. My sister and my brother kept my son for me and headed over to my aunt's house at my request. I was afraid that my husband might come to my parents house looking for him. Which he did. My husband and I didn't see eachother for about three days after that. We talked on the phone, but all I said was that I wanted to either go see a marriage counselor or get a divorce, I couldn't stay married to him like this. The sad part is that we have been married not even two years. I am still with him, and we did eventually reconcille. But lately our relationship has headed south again. He's going back to the way he was before I moved out. I am pulled in two directions.... I want to get away from him because he is so mean to me emotionally (never hit me), but he is my kids' father, and my son adores him. I know it is important for the kids to have both parents under one roof, but it is also important for them to get along and not fight in front of them. I guess what I am after here is to make sure I am not crazy like he tells me. This qualifies to me as an abusive relationship, and I really don't like being in the same house with him - thank God he works evenings - but I have stayed as long as I have for my kids. That doesn't make me a bad person, does it? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Let me tell you a little about him </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">How about a little more about you?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> he talks to me in an insulting way, telling me I am stupid, I am a jerk or a b**ch, telling me I am a bad mother and a bad wife </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What are his reasons for this?

Some about me? Well, for starters, I am 22 years old and I work in a cancer clinic in Texas. I enjoy spending time playing with my son. We take him places together; to the mall to play on the toys and to the pond to feed the ducks. The seagulls make him laugh, but he isn't sure what to think about the ducks yet. My daily routine is pretty much the same from day to day. I get up about 7:00 when my son is ready, we go eat breakfast and then my husband watches him while I take my shower and get dressed. Then my son and I play around in the living room and watch Oswald the Octopus. My husband watches him again while I get my hair dried. Then I go make sure everything my son will need through the day is ready to go before I walk out the door just before 9:00. I get off at 5:00 and come straight home. I am home about 45 minutes before my husband leaves for work. During that time, he usually will watch my son while I eat a quick snack and have a minute to rest. Then it's all hands on deck once he leaves. I get the baby bathed, fed, we play, occassionally we get in the hot tub, we read books together. Most of our play time is spent with me chasing behind him to try to keep him from falling into things - he's just getting good at walking. We may run to the grocery store and do the shopping, or something like that. By 8:30 we're winding things down and getting ready to go to sleep. After he's asleep it's the usual laundry, dishes, and cleaning up the toys bit. Housework usually comes into play on weekends. By 10:00 I'm exhausted and reading a book in bed. Then my son is still up several times during the night. And I get to repeat all that lovely fun the next day. It's getting harder to be the only one there with him and work full time. Early pregnancy takes a toll on your energy levels. My husband gets home sometime after midnight and likes to wake me up to talk to me about his evening. I usually ask him to do a few small things to help out while he's at home with the baby. To day it was to put the sheets on the bed. I try very hard to keep my son's routine just about the same everyday. I try hard to keep the house straight, and I'm thinking a lot about how in the world I am going to manage three kids under the age of two. I usually do something to pamper myself on my husband's days off. I take a candlelit bubble bath. and once every four months or so, I go get a hair trim, and I would love to start having pedicures done then too. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I am very consumed with how well my son is provided for, making sure he has everything he could possibly need and so on... I am making plans to begin a very small part time college course in the spring, hopefully. Right now, every future plan I have depends on how these two babies do. I have a lot of worries about my kids. And it doesn't help to keep seeing articles about twins being so prone to premature birth and all the problems that can bring on. My doctor has already told me that he will take me off of work in the next few months. My husband doesn't earn enough to even pay the rent! How are we going to manage when I can't work? After my twins are born, I won't be able to move well for a while because my twins will be born by c-section (my second), how is he going to hand taking care of the twins and our ne year old? Do you see why I am so concerned? Do you get an idea about what I am like? What else would you like to know?