I haven't been here in months but got an email from Dr. Harley. I have emailed my H because he will not discuss anything in person. Our marriage is at the very end. I do not want it to end, but his inability (unwillingness) to communicate, face to face, or even now by email is making me realize that it IS over.
A couple years ago I found an email entitled Princess. Some of you may remember this, I had to register again, my previous ID was Sobroken. Well, the emailing has continued, not to just this one "Princess", many others. It has grown into a full-blown chat addiction, with once in a while cybers, very objectionable profile pictures left on computer. (sometimes he forgets to delete them)

It has been three years at least since I discovered this behavior. I do not know if he has had a PA, numerous EAs though. The amount of pain that my young ones are experiencing is intolerable. He refuses counseling. Went once and never went back. There is no talking to him, he simply walks up to bed. If I follow, I am cornering him and "pressuring him". Understand, this man comes homes, eats, sits in front of tv or, if I am working, gets online. Any type of communication that has any emotional content is considered confrontational and discussing anything is throwing things in his face. Even discussing the facts as they are, the pain behaviors cause to others, anything.
Dr. Harleys philosophies are not going to work here are they? I'm not going to say that I did a moumentous plan A, but I really tried starting with a wonderfully fancy meal out, overnight in a quaint inn, all to come home to the same trashy behavior online instead of what was supposed to be a new start for us. It is his drug of choice.

I have emailed him that I am ready for a separation. It has been 3 days now I have asked him if he read this email I sent. Started but delted it, I re-sent it, changed it some. It is not totally absent of LB but much better than it would have been yesterday or a few months ago. Without being able to tell him how I feel about anything you can imagine the emotions I have bottled inside. I do not believe Plan A/B are capable of helping us until he is willing to face this addiction.....