I have read the previous posts on chronic illnesses etc. and they have been helpful.
We are in our early 40s and M for 12y in April. The last 5y have been hard. We went to the MB conference in Jan and have been working through the lessons.
My H has had a kidney transplant for 22y <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> and has not really affected our (my) daily lives until about 2 years ago. That's when one of his tested levels (protein in the urine) changed for the first time ever. It *slowly* went up until last year it did a small jump and we knew something was really going on--chronic rejection. We just got his latest results back and it is still rising and now is in "pre-dyalisis" stage. Within 6m he will probably be on dyalisis. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />
This all scares me to death! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> Someone here said that we have come to expect illnesses to be cured and that is me to a tee. It doesn't help that I unconsciencely shut emotion out so I don't feel the pain. I don't want to think about it because it is so upsetting to me. Part of it is the unknown--what changes in him will I have to adjust to (I do alot more around the house and that's okay)--but also fear of the worst case senario--his death. Iwas told, much to my amazement and terror, that people DIE from renal failure. I am scared when I let myself feel.
I also have to deal with the impact on our family--D 11y,S 9y. Both are adopted (own set of issues there) and 11 is probably bipolar. They are difficult children to parent in the best of times.
How do you fulfill each other's emotional needs when there is so much underlying stress and you are busy fulfilling medical needs?
I guess I rambled a little <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> but background is always needed. Thanks for being here.
