WIB,<p>Where are you hanging out these days. Here or over in EN? Let me know. I have a few things I would like to say to you, but I don't want to break into someone elses thread.<p>Actually, it is an apology, but it is a very strange one. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] I won't have time until this weekend to post all of it. So let me know and I will post to you. If you would prefer not to hear from me, let me know. That is fine as well.<p>I am not interested in jamming anything down someones throat.<p>God Bless,<p>JL<p>PS: I liked your post about OP. Don't be so sensitive about things, the people here like you. You should see Cat when she gets here fur ruffled. [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi JL, I have been back and forth but mostly in here. I'll keep my eye out for you. Maybe the fact that I do have a severe allergy to cats has something to do with this. I don't know, it seems the harder I try not to offend someone the worse it gets. [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

I think I Just Decided I know what you're going to say. That was so not nice of you!!!!!

Hey I'm just gonna but in...cause that's just how I am. <p>Chin up WIB!!!
This newcomer vs. oldtimer thing is pretty silly if you ask me. A blanket statement is a blanket statement regardless of who says it. I have to keep reminding myself that a lot of these people are at a different level of healing than I am. I am here at a time when this is still very new...I came here extremely angry...
I have my opinions just as anyone else does, most of them do not mesh well with the others here...oh well..where else am I going to go to know of someone else's similar experience...I can only watch so much Jerry Springer ya know.
Someone made refrence to the fact that once you've been here 2 years or so you'll know the house rules...it is my sincere hope to have moved on by then..no disrespect to anyone that hasn't.
Everyone's situation is different ...Doc and I are not married..just in a commited relationship, where he slipped...and I am not going to beat him up over it forever...I was married when I met him..I did not have an PA...I'm probably guilty of an EA tho. I ended my marriage before I allowed anything physical. So maybe my opinions are more liberal than others, I see both sides of the fence though. I just wanted some help and support dealing with Doc's infidelity and to be able to accept the OC.
I got carried away here...LOL...I just wanted to say that your thought and insights are appreciated and valued by me [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Want it back,<p>I&#8217;ve been coming here for quite awhile and have become pretty adept at distinguishing between posters who really do want to gain understanding and develop a supportive network and those that just want to antagonize. I strongly believe you&#8217;re on the right path. Give it some time and patience. Differing opinions can be healthy ways of learning. The benefits you can reap from this site are pretty outstanding. This place runs the gamut from venting, unintelligible babble, to excellent, supportive advice. The focus of the ladies/gents here is on the recovery of the marriage. That is their priority. There is room for compassion and empathy for other situations, such as mine, but the priority will not change&#8230;.and should not change. That is what this forum was designed for. I love coming here and have a great fondness for many here. I have developed a protective streak that sometimes surfaces in a less than flattering way&#8230;. only because I firmly believe these folks got a really raw deal and get bent out of shape when people try to add insult to injury&#8230;.kind of like kicking a dog when it&#8217;s down. That&#8217;s so NOT cool. But, anyway, I went off on a tangent. I guess my reason for posting is because I see the potential for something good with you and this board. <p>OB1
[img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Thanks Girls, I am the first one to admit that I as much as anyone has so much to learn here. Coming to this site has been the first active thing either my husband or I have done to try to fix things between us(and we've been trying for over a year now). It's foolish to think that it can be done on your own. He hasn't even finished reading all the material yet(although I have) and already there has been such a big difference in "us" in just the last two weeks. I have very high hopes. Not just for me, but for everyone here. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

<p>[ March 03, 2002: Message edited by: catnip ]</p>

WIB,<p>I'm confused. I won't post to you if you don't want. What do you think I am going to tell you?<p>God Bless,<p>JL

I need to learn how to use this quote thing...lol..anyone care to explain how to quote someone? <p>Catnip...those why's are a killer aren't they?that's what I struggle with the most. Why?
That is the one thing I can't resolve. But then again is any reason Doc can give me ever going to be good enough?<p>I've said it before I appreciate all of you for having the strength and courage to be here and share .
Please understand that I have a sarcastic sense of humor and that it shines thru the most when I feel my worst. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Peace

JL, Never mind. I must just be confused. Please go ahead and post as long as you're not going to bash me. Can't take that right now.
DG, all you do is clck on the "quote" tab below where you are typing your message and either type or paste what you want between the two quotes. If you're more confused now I'm sure someone can explain it better.

WIB,<p>Don't worry it is not my intention to bash you. Never was and never will be. No need to do that. <p>I'll compose me post this weekend. Have a good one.<p>God Bless,<p>JL

I think it is time for us to try to be understanding and non-judgmental of one another. I know I am one of the guiltiest of this as I am ready to go into combat at the slightest suspicion of an interloper because, frankly, I am feeling very protective of us and am afraid we are going to scare away those newly suffering and fresh into discovery. Their pain is raw and new and they are feeling confused, vulnerable, helpless and battered emotionally.<p>I am going to try to be kinder than I have been. I may not succeed at first, but I will try. I'm not good at it. This worries me.<p>I don't know what to do about people who don't belong here and worry that maybe they are legit but just angry and being offensive. I don't know what to do about people who come here flinging disrespectful judgments.<p>Catnip =^^=<p>[ March 02, 2002: Message edited by: catnip ]</p>