I have a wonderful sister who has been through many personal tragedies herself but she always finds the time to send these funny little emails to me. Even my H thought it was funny so this is for the guys too.<p>Hormone Humor<p>Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when
all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands.
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license
in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other.<p> DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: Wow! Look at you!
DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe.
<p>PMS TOP 14 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR
Pass My Shotgun
Psychotic Mood Shift
Perpetual Munching Spree
Puffy Midsection
People Make Me Sick
Provide My Sweets
Pardon My Sobbing
Pimples May Surface
Pass My Sweatpants
Plainly; Men Suck
Pack My Stuff
Permanent Menstrual Syndrome
<p>Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this
house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the
bulb is BURNED OUT! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they
figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to
find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME
CUPBOARD for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle, actually
find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the
STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND UNDERNEATH IT
WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY? BECAUSE
NO-ONE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL
SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12' DEEP THROUGHOUT THE
ENTIRE HOUSE.THE HOUSE? - IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS #@*$!#@!...
HOUSE!
I'm sorry...what did you ask me?
