Has any good come out of your situations?
We are 2 & 1/2 years into recovery.
So far:
1. Our marriage is better than ever
2. We've adopted a little baby boy whom we love dearly
3. We're talking about adopting a girl now
4. My H's daughter (the oc) has a relationship with us established by the courts that her mom can't tamper with without SERIOUS repercussions
5. My son's God father got saved the day we had the baby dedication service
6. My brother in law got saved the day we had the baby dedication service
7. Both my brother-in law and my son's Godfather look at the way we've handled things...(and we tell them, don't look to us, look to God)
8. We are focused on the future. We accept that a big chunk of our monthly income is gone, but we're talking about starting a small business in my name to recover some of the money.
9. We are a lot more relaxed and foriving of one another.
10. My H is learning how to be accountable for his actions...and in some cases, he's even learning how to be proactive in order to avoid drama with oc's mom.
(I had to come up with ten)<p>Any other good reports??????

I'll play!<p>1. Our marriage is better and stronger than ever.
2. The child born of the affair is a complete darling and a 'daddy's boy' with a terrific disposition. He turned three last winter.
3. I learned a lot about myself. I learned patience when I was not, forgiveness when I was hurt, how to listen when I didn't like the message, and how to act appropriately regardless of what everyone else was doing.
4. I got a "personal" relationship with God out of this trial. It helped to reawaken my faith.
5. I've had opportunities to "give back" to the community the wonderful gifts that I was given during this ordeal---including spending time here at MB coaching others.<p>(I'll stop at five... [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] )<p>[ April 11, 2002: Message edited by: K ]</p>

K!!!!! So good to see your post! I have often wondered how the other H's in Sailorman's position have been doing! How is your W doing? I hope she is continuing to recover well!<p>Now, for the topic for this thread;<p>1. Sailorman and I are closer than we have been in a very long time(even with him so far away, but getting closer to home every day!)<p>2. Our Abbi turned 1 in March, and is such a joy to watch as she learns a new thing every day!<p>3. I, like K, have found a closer relationship with the Lord, have even taken up being a leader for a Tues. night women's bible study(pray for us as we are going to start a new study with Max Lucado's "He Chose the Nails" in a week and a half)<p>4. Because of Sailorman, I have found many new friends all over the country that I would love to meet in person someday!<p>Can't wait to see everyone else's views on how this has changed them.<p>Love,<p>Tigger

Has any good come out of my situation?<p>

1. Met my H at a church where OC insisted on attending when he was 8 because they have an awesome children's ministry.
2. If it were not for OC in my life, I never would have met my H because I probably would not have been in church consistently.
3. One of my grandmothers said that OC would grow out of that "lovey-dovey stage" so be prepared. He's 19 now and he never grew out of it! He still wants kisses (on the lips) and hugs and affection from me.
4. OC maintaining his virginity.
5. OC loves and serves God and has a relationship with Christ.
6. OC has gotten several of his friends radically saved!
7. OC helps A LOT with our special needs twins if we ever want to go see a movie or dinner or both. I pay him and I have always paid him for babysitting cuz I never wanted him to resent his siblings.
8. OC ships out to boot camp in 2 months to go learn how he can serve his country.

<p>*sigh*<p> [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] Do I sound like a proud mom?!! Well, I am! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] I have no regrets about keeping my OC. I DO regret ever having been an OW, but good did come out of it. This loving, godly young man that I call my son.

Me too!<p>1. I've learned that "family" can mean many things. (OC, OC's family, close friends, etc.)<p>2. The OC in my life is a true blessing and a window that was opened to me when the door closed on my marriage.<p>3. I'm stronger than I think. <p>4. My relationship with God has been renewed.<p>5. That life is about change, and there are no guarantees.

BTDT<p>You do sound like a proud Mom and it sounds like you have every reason to be.
Heck reading that made me feel proud of your son.<p>
I hope to one day to feel blessed by this situation instead of just feeling cursed.<p>Peace and TGIF!!!!!!!!!<p>Docs Girl<p>Peace!

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by DocsGirl:
<strong>...I hope to one day to feel blessed by this situation instead of just feeling cursed...</strong><hr></blockquote><p>I guess my point is that the Lord has taken care of my OC without contact from MM's family. I mean, you have to look at the facts. They are what they are. He is a fine young man and it is NOT because of me (my character, etc.). I know it's because of God in his life, protecting him, & guiding me...<p>My hat is off to any spouse who can forgive their mate for infidelity and further, creating an OC through infidelity. Now that I am a wife, I cannot imagine myself forgiving in that situation. You all are much stronger than I would or could ever be. I just don't know about myself in your shoes... you know, if I could trust that I would do the godly thing... [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] <p>I do know that with God all things are possible and it IS possible for every curse to be reversed! So hang in there and keep the faith! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]<p>[ April 12, 2002: Message edited by: BINthereDUNthat ]</p>