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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 107
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OP
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 107 |
Today is the day H goes for his bi-weekly visit. It's been 10 months and it is still so hard for me. When H and I married his children with OW were 5 and 4. I knew that he would be seeing them often. I could deal with that. When our ds was born I knew that it would be until he was about 10 before those frequent visits would stop and he would be home full time. Today, as he was getting ready to leave for his visit it occured to me that on our 23 wedding anniversary those visits would stop thanks to OC being born as a result of an A with OW. I don't know if I can handle 23 years of this. I can't stop crying thinking about it. My heart is just broken. I am so upset that our ds will never in his childhood have a father that can committ full time to him. He will be 20 when the visits stop. I don't want him to spend any time with H's C with OW that is not even an option with me. <p>H asked me this morning as I was crying when I'm ever going to get over this. I told him it will take me years not to feel this pain. I know he loves me. I know he's sorry. I know he's working on us and our marriage. I know all of this but it doesn't ease the pain I feel.<p>I just needed to share this with those who can understand my pain. It helps. Thank you! And thank you for letting me know I'm entitled to have these feelings. I read this board every day and find so much comfort here. I truly value the honesty you all share here.<p>Take care,
Why
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 713
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 713 |
Why, I understand your pain. I married a man with no kids, no prior relationships.We have been married over 15 years, with now two small kids. NOw since his affair, and OC, I am supposed to share his time with OC. I resent it completely.That is not the marriage I signed up for, no shape or form.My H wants to see OC as frequently as yours is-I don't want it, don't want to support it. I don't feel my family, me, my kids should pay the price for OW;s choice to have child.WE pay the price for Cs --huge payments--why must time be involved? I understand your tears, your whining, etc. It is horrible, and I hate it too.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 2,342
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 2,342 |
Why I remember you and pray for you all the time. I nkow it's hard enough with previous c's, but to be betrayed with x/w is horrible and to continue visits at youe expense is purely a selfish act!<p>"You just sit still, I love you and will be right back{as your heart is ripped from your soul} ok?"<p>SELFISH BEHAVIOUR!! love Debi
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