I came here wanting to flip out and call exOW every name in the book! My car got keyed again! I own my own home in a decent neighborhood. So it's not like I'm in an area where vandalism is prevalent. exOW keyed my car a few months ago for those of you who remember. For the first time in a long time I wanted revenge. I called my cousins and my girls! BTDT- I was ready to go ghetto on her behind! Then I broke down and prayed real hard and I remembered that scripture where God says vengeance will be mine. It took me a while and a few drinks <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> to calm down. But I'm still pissed I went to the police station to file a report and a Progressive Insurance guy just happened to be there. I asked him to look at my car and tell me if it was keyed or side swiped? He told me if my car was side swiped it would be a dent then proceeded to point out the cross marks (X's) on the side of my car which shows it was keyed. I drive a nice luxury car. As I stated before it's my first and my H and I bussed our behind for years to afford a car like this. Even if it was a piece of crap we still worked hard for it and to have someone do damage because they are ignorant and pathetic doesn't make any sense. So I sit here knowing I could have my family and friends doing damage to exOW car right now but feeling good I took the high road.

The reason why I think exOW did it was because she tried to serve H paperwork requiring him to go to court yesterday but he was out of town so it was too late for her to serve him. This is her 7 or 8 contempt motion for the same thing. I think (this is all speculation) the court might have said something about her wasting the court time and our lawyer emailed her a copy of the letter we are giving the Judge stating our position on NC yesterday. H was supposed to go back to court 7/23 for a follow up. If I was an ignorant woman and even if I got myself in this situation I would probably want to lash out too. Knowing I'm filing all these contempt motion and something keeps going wrong. And even though he fought for visitation he really is giving up and OC will not have a father like my other three kids.

I don't know what's going on in her head but I do know I can't afford to keep repairing a car and the police keeps saying if I don't see her doing it it's nothing they can do about it!

The Progressive guy told me she did about $1000+ damage to the car. We will have to pay $500 no matter what out of our pockets!

I wanted to cry all day today because I'm trying to do the right thing and let vengeance be handled the right way but it's hard. Those of you I chat with or have read my older posts know I used to have an explosive temper! And it flared up today for the first time in a long time. And I'm PMS'ing as you can tell from my last post on Z thread! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I'm trying hard guys my 10th wedding anniversary is Tuesday July 16. I was looking forward to it so much! I/We were so happy we made and are in love after 10 years of marriage and 13 years of being together. We'll almost 10 years. And I'm LB's inside because he got us into this situation we were suppose to go away in March now I feel like the money needs to go towards repairing the car. This would have been the first time we went away together since D-day! I will be 30 August 10th guys I don't want to spend another 13 years this way I just want to live. Do you understand what I'm saying.

Thanks for allowing me to vent.

Tee

<small>[ July 13, 2002, 12:35 AM: Message edited by: UNSure919400 ]</small>

Although you may be unable to prove the xow did this, your attorney should know that this is happening to you. If the judge presiding over your court cases knows that this is being done, he could sternly warn her that if she is caught near your home, it will be assumed that she is guilty of this crime. Ask your neighbors as they may have seen something and warn them to watch out for her.

It seems the time away together would be far more important than fixing the car. Besides, if you fix it won't she be likely to do it again? Fix it when she's moved on to her next obsession. Don't you think saying to your H that you can't go because of xow would be a love bust? Don't let her ruin any more than she already has.

I, like you, realize that vengence is the Lord's. I've just sat back and watched Him work. I must say He's been far more clever than I could have ever been and made me chuckle. Don't you think what is going on in court is a part of that vengence? I do think it sad that this child will not have a father. It's the only truly innocent one.

Anyway, Happy Anniversary. My 19th will be on July 16th.

Tee,

I know that I don't post to you often, but I was touched with the fact that you took the high road in this situation! Unfortunately, I can see someone doing this because she didn't get her way! But, with you remembering that verse of God saying vengence will be His, she will get her's in the end! That's kind of how we've dealt with this whole thing.

Now, for the insurance part. I know it won't help you at this time, but have you considered going lower on the deductible? I used to be a licensed insurance agent, and it is often worth it in the long run to have the lower deducts, especially when the damage isn't quite as much, and you end up paying for the whole thing. The prices usually aren't that great of a difference, that you may be able to afford it. I would at least look into it for the future.

But, again, I think that you did a great job in not getting your girls to take care of this for you!

Tigger

Unsure,
Baby you know I'm here for you.
I'll say a prayer for you . I wish you a happy 10th anny and ahead of time a Happy Birthday to you!

I am sorry for you honey, I wish you peace.
That's incredible but not really when you're dealing w/someone who has the scruples of a sophmoric humanbeing!

Now you go repair your luxury ride and drive it with your head up!

Unsure, kiss your H and tell him NOTHING can rock you two if you stick together.

Also log EVERYTHING that you think that maniac is doing, we did for well over a year and it got a letter from the state of - - - - telling her the state was intending to press charges of stalking and telephone harrassment if her abhorent behavior didn't halt immediatly! It did somewhat... We were getting business calls using H's whole tape w/ow telling H she'd wait forever when he got out of his cage...waking baby to "talk to daddy", playing music and crying...the list is endless....
Tailgating me, bumping into me as I went for my daily walk...she parked her car nearby and walked in my neighborhood.... I filed assult charges!
She simply wants my life and I never did a thing back to her cuz I don't care anymore!

I wish you peace.
love
Debi

OMG! The devil is sooo desperate UNSure... trying to ruin your anniversary but it won't work. I'm praying for you. You did the right thing. Maybe you could look into one of those alarms that goes off with every little vibration? Might be a hassle with things setting it off, but it would keep that wicked person away from your stuff...

OR maybe start parking your car in the garage from now on.

Think of it this way--she wants to have a car like yours. Remember, IMO, she wants to be you... Yes, the wrath of man works not the righteousness of God and if you truly want God to take care of this situation (with HIS vengeance), you will definitely have to get out of the way and just keep praying for xOW. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

This is outrageous, but I believe God will not only provide the money to get your car fixed, and whatever deductible needed, AND restore the money back to you supernaturally. Just watch Him. You did the right thing. I'm holding your hand in the spirit. Forgive and let (whomever) did this go. Even tho you know. God knows. He will repay evil with evil. Actually whomever did it has planted their own evil seeds. They will reap what they have sown.

HUGS and prayers for you UNSure!!! <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

You will have a terrific anniversary celebration. I know this has made your H even more sorry he ever got involved with that crazy weirdo. Sheesh!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Also remember this is a person who LOVES dragging you into court so do everything in your power not to lash out at her for any reason whatsoever! She will twist it all around to make herself look like the victim. Especially in this situation where you can't absolutely prove she did it. MORE HUGS to you!!! She probably wants to hear about it in the grapevine. Maybe you could just pretend it didn't even happen. Don't even give her the satisfaction of it getting back to her that you were upset!!!

Unsure,

I can't believe TAH or SAH (which one was yours???) struck again.

But then again, yes I can. Nothing, I mean nothing surprises me with yours.

But you know what ... you took the higher ground an that is why you will continue to receive blessings.

Doesn't it feel good to be in his good grace! I can't imagine being anywhere else.

And you will receive that financial blessing BTDT spoke of. We are both praying on it.

Whenever you get down and out about something OW has done, lay in bed until your H goes to sleep. Look over at him resting peacefully and secure in your love. And think about the fact that the TAH will never, ever see that view of your husband again! That's what I used to do!

Your sista,
Z.

I will respond in detail to all of your posts tomorrow. I just wanted to say THANK YOU! It's means a lot to know people care about you. I've been doing all types of LB's today. I'll explain in detail today/tomorrow. This is my first time getting on today (It's after 12 a.m. so I so I didn't realize you guys responded.)

Z-Thanks again for chattin with me so late tonight and helping me realize what was going on and encouraging me to make up with H tonight. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Amhurt,Tigger,Gem,and BTDT I'll respond to all of your posts tomorrow.

Thank you again!!!!

Tee

Thank again guys. I wish I would have taking the time to read your post Saturday but I didn’t I was so upset. I did a lot of major LB's. To the point that H asked me if he provided no emotional support to the family maybe he should move out. And at that time I could care less and told him to do whatever he wanted. After spending some time out Saturday night in a place where I was totally bored and shouldn't have been I came home knowing I needed to make up with H. Talking with Z made me realize there was no need to put it off.

I spent yesterday talking to H and I did apologize for my LB's. We are still going to spend the night out Saturday celebrating our Anniversary. It was a good conversation and we both realized that lately the last two months we weren't taking care of each others emotional needs as much as we were. We kind of slacked off thinking all right we are fixed now. But I was feeling resentful because we weren't spending a lot of one on one time. We figured out a plan and I know things will be o.k. Wish us luck and keep us in your prayers.

Amhurt-Happy Anniversary to you too. We are still planning on attending the trip. I think I got super pissed because we shelled out a lot of money because of H's mistake. Attorney fees, CS etc.... So it was like you know what now it's time for her to come out of her pocket. But I'm happy I took the high road I feel better and my conscience isn't kicking my behind! With my luck a neighbor would have witnessed it or something.

Tigger-Thank you for taking the time to respond and for giving me the Insurance information I will find out the monetary difference re: deductibles.

Gem-Thank You! You and Z think a like I did exactly what you both said. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> I realized I was letting exOW ruin what is a special day to me and for what? Nothing! I will continue to log everything so if she's eventually caught doing something I have the evidence. Thank you for your advance well wishes. I can't believe I'll be the big 30. I guess I'm all grown up now. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

BTDT-I guess I will start keeping the car in the garage. Since I'm still not working I really can't afford to keep repairing the car letting her continue to damage it. I'll keep my head held high and put my faith in God! I know he'll take care of this situation. I thought about her always taking me to court and calling the cops over nothing so I know she would have had the police knocking my door down. I think Satan wanted me to react the wrong way but thanks to my faith in Jah I prayed first.

Z- My S.I.R. thank you for taking the extra time to make me laugh! I was feeling really down. You really helped me relax. I'm not as upset about it as I was but I'm still angry. I prayed real hard that I didn't run into her in the supermarket etc... and I didn't! I know if she did one little thing I probably would be writing you guys saying I went to jail for slugging TAH. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> j/k she's not worth it my babies need me.

I realize now that if I let her exOW might have ruined what I was looking forward to. I think I told her on d-day that our anniversary was in July so she might have planned this who knows. I am looking forward to tomorrow and this weekend. I can't wait to get my groove on with out worry about the kids hearing. LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Thanks again all.

Tee

PS-Twiisty I forgot to thank ou for letting me vent on you Friday too!

I'm glad your Anniversary turned out nice.

Tee

<small>[ July 15, 2002, 08:33 AM: Message edited by: UNSure919400 ]</small>

oopsie!

<small>[ July 16, 2002, 03:08 AM: Message edited by: BINthereDUNthat ]</small>

Something else occurred to me, this COULD be a test from heaven to see how serious you are about upholding the marital vows that you made & the commitment you made to forgive your H and survive his A!!!

Sometimes God will test our commitment. I don't believe He tests our faith because after all, He is the faith giver, but I do believe He tests our commitment and dedication to Him. You hang in there!!!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Something else occurred to me, this COULD be a test from heaven to see how serious you are about upholding the marital vows that you made & the commitment you made to forgive your H and survive his A! </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">BTDT if this was a test I pray and hope I passed. I can say after talking to H and praying hard! I honestly feel better. I can also tell you my H and I had a wonderful morning. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> I know from his phone calls home that the smile on his face is just as big as the smile on my face. We are both excited about spending this weekend together. I'm just praying mother nature isn't on time! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Happy 10th Anniversary to us! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Unsure