i am a new member but i have been a religious visitor to mb website.
here is my "story"
i have been married to my w 10 years in january we have 2 kids 4 and 2, my w works out of town alot, there is alot of times ive called her hotel all hours of the night with no answer,
she always has a good story, for instance in august she said she unplugged the phaone because kids kept prank calling, and her cell was in the veh. i understand i have problems and am working hard at fixing them we are currently seperated, i stay at my office and shower eat etc at home until our house sells, i want desperatly to work this out and she has no want at all its like she doesnt care. i found out why a few weeks back, there was this # kept showing up on cid,she was calling and he was calling her 2-3 times a day, i even picked up the phone once to hear them ending a conversation with i love yous, i was devastated, angry , and every emotion in between. i confronted her and again another good story, which i didnt believe. so i bought a recorder and recorded theyre conversation, which turned out terrible they were having phone sex talking about there next trip which he works for the co also they live in seperate states and he is also married. i have been on this forum and i did what the majority said and reveled it to his wife. my wife still denies anything sexual has happened, she blames me for everything. i react when she gives me these "stories with anger and yelling" i have never laid a hand on her, but the ow told me he "came clean" but also said no sex, she also informed me that my w told him that i beat her.
i cant believe this is going on my w was a very straight laced church girl when we met, and now this. i thought by telling the ow that it would end the a, giving us a chance at reconc but it has made it worse. what if anything can i do to improve my situation <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Move on, I am in a similar situation. My W calls alot of guys on her cell phone. She got mad when I confronted her with it. So, she gave me an excuse. I calmed down and I started to think. I will have to catch her in the act. So I will be patient and let everything build up so there won't be any confusion or misunderstandings. Just be nature for now and catch in the act.

dalson, that's just how my husband is. He is also often aggressive and abusive. We are presently separated because he's at a non-family station (being in the army). He calls every day or every other day and I talk to him with affection but NO trust.
I realise that I made a committment in marriage which i will do my best to keep up, but i also have a committemnt to this life given to me by God. I think living a glowing self-reliant life is also my responsibility. I pray for my husband because he's got a spiritual sickness, but I am now focusing on strengthening myself. I have a good job, which i think came as a blessing (because it was so sudden and unexpected), and I am really focusing on my prayer to remain cheerful and constructive. I don't think we can change anybody unless they deep down decide to change, and getting hooked to their messy behaviour just messes us up. I am praying for my own long term safety and happiness and of course for my husband's higher self to kick in. Please do take care, and all the best