Hi ive been married for 18 months and we have been together just over 5 years we
have lived together just over 3 years , I have read alot on how and what I should
have done as I was an alcoholic and did not meet my wife's emotional needs and
neglected her as in independent behaviour and angry outbursts and basiclly abused
her
and I have given up the drink as I realized this was a contributing factor after
she walked out on me after a drunken angry outburst when I told her that I had
kissed someone else over twelve months ago and I have given it a lot of thought on
how I was treating her and she has told me that it seemed I did not want to be
near her I explained that I think it was the guilt that stopped me treating her
the way I should of even though i kissed some in a drunken state it was no excuse
as i had told my wife when we first started seeing each other if she ever kissed
someone else she may aswell sleep with them as i would be out the door so she has
held onto that all the time we have been togther i have been going to a
counsellor to better myself and work on my faults but i do want to save our
marraige as i do love her so much but she has said that she has fallen out of love
with me as her love bank account has run dry but she has said the account is
still there but the bank is closed she had been telling me that she hadn't
been happy for sometime but i thought everything was ok well now i hope i
haven't left it to late to of woken up in which my eyes are very wide open now

i have given her some of the ideas off your sight and asked her if it was
informative to her and she has said yes and i said i'd like to put what
we've learnt into practice to make our relationship blossom how or what would
you suggest for me to do i would really like your advise as i do really want to
save our marrige as she has given up on working on it and i have only just started
unfortunately it has been six weeks since she has left and is surggesting we
should sell the house please help

You NEED to use capital letters and periods.
It is EXTREMELY hard to read.

What are you doing for your drinking? Are you going to A.A. or some other support group?

i have given her some of the ideas off your sight
Don’t try to “educate” her.
Simply learn it & do it. This will be far more effective than trying to teach it to her (especially since you just found this stuff yourself).

i said i'd like to put what we've learnt into practice
Reading it is not learning it. Doing it is learning it.
YOU need to read and ask questions here and YOU need to apply these principles in your life, regardless of what she does.

No I am not going to A/A as i do not feel the need to drink but i do know if i had one i would have fifty so I am not going to drink at all and as in what i was meaning about Learng isthat i have leant a lot about myself aswell

thank you for your insight but how can i put it into pracice when i don't see her??? <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Please use some periods.
Your posts are all one very long sentence.

No I am not going to A/A as i do not feel the need to drink
So what happens later when you will feel the need to drink?

You can practice a lot of MB principles by doing them with your family, friends and co-workers.

For example, you can stop disrespectful judgements on other people.

Read the links below.

CHRIS,
The need to drink is in the brain, I have made a promise to myself, NOT to drink again.
If I can not keep a prosmise to myself How am I ever going to keep a promise to anybody else Let alone the one i promised to love and cheerish for the rest of my life, In which iI didn't keep that very importent promise In which I am paying DEARLY for now, and would like to make it up to her if she ever returns TO see I am making changes TO BE ABLE TO MEET HER NEEDS AND KEEP MY WORD.
In this time of separation, I would rather prove to myself, that i can be a better person without the grog, than with it.As it has already proven that I am not a very gracesious drunk as I have found out the hard way In which i regret Immensely
IF ONE CAN'T PROVE TO HIMSELF TO BE WORTHY OF HIMSELF,
HOW CAN HE PROVE HIMSELF TO BE WORTHY TO OTHERS