I need everyon's advice or expertise rather. What happens if you give up parental rights? I know you are still required to pay cs and med insurance etc. I'm looking for away to cut off all contact between h and ow, or our marriage is not going to survive, and unfortunately I have 2 small children and one on the way, I'm trying to stick it out for there good, but it's really becoming a tough situation, arguing, screaming, fighting constantly can't be good for anyone. Please help.

If you give up parental rights your husband will lose all rights to child, he has no say so in any thing ow woman does ever[about child] He will pay support and not be allowed to see the child.

How ever at the moment the fighting , arguing and screaming should be addressed. Does that mean you dont agree about what should be done, or are you fighting because other woman is in contact and you dont want that.
Have you tried counseling, because giving up his parental rights, may not end your suffering completely, sometimes the fights and arguements stay.

It is hard taking care of two children and another on the way.. Take care of your self first. Then work on the rest.

Thanks for the advice. The fighting is mostly about the contact between ow and h. h is not, nor has he ever seen the child and for now that is how it is going to be. He said that's how he wants it. However the judge ordered her to contact him of any medical treatment she receives, for a while the contact was every week for trivial, meaningless, things. Now it has slowed to just being informed of meidcal treatment. The problem is he want tell me about the contact because I just blow up at him, so he tells me he hasn't heard from her, then after I few weeks I told him I don't believe you and he confessed she called to tell him oc had to go to er. So I'm very upset b/c I feel like he isn't being honest. Yes we did see a marriage counsler who advised him not to speak to her unless I was present, which has yet to happen, and by the way they work together!!!!!!

Men see things so different
he probably doesnt tell you , because he thinks he is keeping you from fighting.. however as his wife... You just know when they are not being honest.

Not how we as women see it, but I bett hats whats on his mind.

Yelo,

Call a lawyer, it does depend on the state were the child is.

We filed first in a higher court for establishing paternity, when the dna came out, Mr. "T" signed away his rights to the child. We pay CS and Health insurance and Ex-Ow was sent a no contact letter by both of us. So far she has honored that and thankfully has married recently.

I would check with an attorney. "Signing away" your rights is called, "Awarding sole care and custody" to OW. At least that is here it is. She didn't argue with Mr."T". She was actually quite shocked and sad I was told. (This is after she stalked him and did numerous things...but I digress...)

I don't think a judge can order contact...all he/she can do is award CS and make decisions that pertain to visitating..but cannot force you to have contact...I would check into that again...

We are doing well with No contact as per Mr."T"'s choice and I am ok with it. Adoption was Mr."T"'s second choice since in hindsight, his first choice was to leave Ex-OW alone and not go near her with a ten foot pole....ahhhh, live and learn.

Let me know how it goes with you as I am interested in how you fare.

Hugs and prayers,
Twiisty

I also suggest speaking with an attorney. In most states, you cannot simply sign away your parental rights unless there is someone else there to fill in the vacating role, or if the mother is financially and psychologically stable enough to go it alone. The court will not rule in favor of the adult’s request, but will instead rule in the “best interest of the child”. Sometimes, according to the state, the child’s best interest would be to retain the father position filled by the bio father, whether he wants it or not. I don’t understand the whole reasoning behind that. I know I have the info somewhere, but do not have time to dig it up right now. I think it has something to do with having both parental roles filled, whenever possible, for the sake of the child’s sense of self and security in knowing their origins. Also, many judges frown upon a parent trying to shirk parental responsibility for the sake of personal convenience. Not MY perspective, but the view of the courts (California). If I come across it, I will post it for you. Now, Twiisty brought up an acceptable alternative: agreeing to sole physical and legal custody to the mother. By doing that, it leaves no reason for which the OW would need to contact your H. SHE would be completely responsible for all decision making and would not have to account to anyone. H would still be financially responsible, but that’s it.