My H and I just finished a long talk. He started out by saying that he was going through a lot and from there we covered how we felt about our marriage & skirted around the what now topic. He admitted that he didn't know that the healing process took so long (meaning recovering from my A 4 yrs ago). And that after I threw him out in Dec., he didn't know what to do. I told him that all I wanted was for him at that time to stand up to me and say - no I'm not leaving. I told him how I thought our communication just dropped off and from there neither of us really knew how the other felt about anything. I thought everything was going well until I started in on him moving back in. Now - I've hit a wall again. We both said earlier that separation wasn't the best thing, so why the hesitation on moving the rest of his stuff home? If he wasn't planning on leaving me for the OW, why is he acting scared now? When he didn't commit to actually moving, my face gave away my hurt. He asked me why I was looking like that & I told him, I don't know how to convince you that I don't plan on throwing you out. And that ended the conversation. Ya'll - what now? We can't fix this marriage being separated. We just saw that it didn't work, so why continue living like this. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

I thought that maybe after our conversation he'd realize that I loved him & I really want to go back to how it used to be. He says it'll never be like it was when we were dating & 1st married. Well - I don't believe that! Am I too optimistic? But somehow, I think that you can make a marriage better after an affair - it's a lot of hard work, but I'm willing if he is! All I know is that I want my marriage back. But if he doesn't come home, how can we even restore it?