well went to doctors you were all right I don't need to go though this by myself. She handled me with kid gloves and was very understanding. She put me on medication and I do see a slight change I still feel numb at times but I find I don't cry half as much as I did. I'm see a therapist tomorrow and I'm a bit nervous about that also but I have to get myself better and I need to make the first step even though there baby steps I have to do it. Sometimes this just seems so make believe and it's not really happening It has such a numbing effect on my life. My husband is by my side and that does help at times he made a STUPID mistake 2 years ago and we have to learn to love and trust each other again. HARD!!! On my part he said he will do what ever it takes we will need to go to mc but right know I need to work on making my self strong again. In this whole process I realized alot about myself some good and some bad and I hope this will make me a better person. But boy I would have like to go about it a different way that's what is so hard about all of this I'm just an innecent bystander that got hurt and I'm having a hard time with that. I'm feeling a little better and thank you just for reading my post. I don't feel so.... alone.

Dear LJ,

I am glad it went well at the doctor's office. Keep us posted on how you are doing. We are all pulling for you.

MJ