Hello MJ!
Thanks for asking how I am doing. I am still here, reading occasionally. As I don’t have much “free time”… having a very active toddler around makes it difficult to be on the computer as often as I like… and by the time I get the free time, I either spend it with H or I am just too tired to type up anything…
Thank goodness today, Lil Bit is taking a nap(an afternoon rarity, here lately) and I can post a little update on everything!
Things are going VERY well with H and I. I am overjoyed at the change I have seen in him in the last few weeks… He has always wanted me to be home with any children that we have and now that I am laid off, I am home with Lil Bit every day!
I LOVE being home with her, but I miss the money from my job. My unemployment benefits are a little help, but we are heading into a BIG financial hole and I am afraid that soon we may not be able to climb out very easily.
I had a bit of a trigger yesterday. About a week ago I had lost a diamond earring that H had bought for me last Christmas. At the time, I wasn’t too worried about the earring, as I have lost one before and have another that looks very similar. Then yesterday, H found the earring! He handed it to me and I cried. I was so happy that he found it! In the course of realizing how much these earrings actually meant to me, I remembered the Marquise Diamond solitaire ring that H had bought me the Christmas before last. (This was the Christmas that he was involved with exOW as well as found out that she was pg.)
As I took the ring out of the box, I asked him if he understood why I never wear it anymore.
Not really, he said.
Well, its because I now know that at the time that you gave me this ring, you were involved with exOW and that part of my life feels like such a lie. It hurts knowing that you may have given it to me just because you felt guilty.
He hung his head. When he lifted his face to me, he was misty eyed.
He said, “I bought you that ring, because I love you. I know that kind of ring is your favorite and I wanted you to have one. I love you, Stacia. You mean everything to me and I will never take the chance of losing you again.”
He reached out and held me for probably 20 min.
It was one of the most precious moments of our Recovery.
As far as the situation with exOW and Lil Bit, things are going WELL!
ExOW is still using us as her Daycare providers (Mon and Tues 6a-5p and Wed 6a-noon)… and I tell you, I am very happy about it! I get to be with Lil Bit EVERYDAY! Our time with her has jumped dramatically! We have her for 114 hours a wk! And remember there are only 168 hours in a week!
The last 3 wks, exOW has decided not to pick up Lil Bit at noon on Wednesday. Citing that she “might be working over” or “going over to so-n-so’s to do something” and won’t be back by the Normal Exchange time at 7pm, she has opted to wait until Sunday to pick her up. So, that adds up another 7 hours! 121 hrs in a wk! 72.02% of the past 3 weeks has been spent here with H and me!
Thanks again, MJ, for asking about me. I have been meaning to email you and ask how you are doing.
Hugs to you!
