I would like to know if anyone has advise on making decisions on how to divide assets in a second marriage. I own a small home from before the marriage,I have no children but helped raise 3 nephews. My husband has a large estate and has 2 children. If he should die first he wants to leave the house and all his assets to his children. I feel as though I am a guest in this house because it is not mine. I don't want to put any money into it because it will all go to his kids. I suggested that he keep this house for his kids and that we sell mine and buy a new one that would be mine and his. He does not want to leave this house. I am trying to find solutions that would be fair to all of us. By the way I earn 1/10 of what he earns.
Any suggestions would be appreciated
Thanks,
J

I guess I have to ask.

Have you asked your H why he doesn't think that providing for you after he's gone is important?

Because it certainly seems that he doesn't value you, and I can certainly see why you wouldn't want to put money into a place that you can't call home...

I mean, I 'm assuming you're not some kind of golddigger, but it is a little unusual I think...

You have a prenup or anythign that would preclude it?

from my understanding - w/o a pre-nup - you own 1/2 of everything.

Let's talk house - he can only give 1/2 of the house to his kids - he can't decide on where your 1/2 goes.

I suggest you talk to an attorney that specializes in wills/estates.

Maybe you need to discuss w/your husband your needs should he pass on - if his children as grown they have years/years to acquire financial status - you on the other hand DON'T...Start setting money into a fund for you - even if he has to make the contributions..Talk to him about setting up an insurance policy to you should something happen to him.

I'm in a tough spot too - I think my WH has changed his will and cut me off totally..That's how step children brainwash their parent against their spouse..

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by ITHURTS:
<strong> from my understanding - w/o a pre-nup - you own 1/2 of everything.

Let's talk house - he can only give 1/2 of the house to his kids - he can't decide on where your 1/2 goes.

</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Maybe not ITHURTS.
IF Jamie lives in an equitable distribution state...

It (equitable distribution), generally means that all marital property acquired during the marriage is subject to division. Property brought into the marriage i.e. that a person had before the marriage are not subject to division (in a divorce).

As for your H writing you out of the will...
I recently read:
"You usually can’t disinherit your spouse, but in every state except Louisiana you may disinherit your children."

In my state a spouse can be written out of a will, but as long as the couple is still legally wed, the spouse may contest the will, and will be entitled to a percentage (in my state I believe it is 30%) or a share of the estate.

Please check with your attorney.
And I might add, if you don't already have a will for yourself, please get one.

Hi,
Tomorrow we are discussing the will and I appreciate all of your feed back. I will tell him what I need. I have no problem with him giving the children the house but I feel that we should be working towards something together. I just want a home that is ours and I am willing to sell my house and buy another together. It is really hard for me to think that if he should pass before I do that his ex will move into this house with the kids and I have done all of the decorating! I would think that the will would be a different issue than going through a divorce.
Thanks alot,
J