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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 177
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 177 |
Yesterday H went out food shopping, he left at 11.00 (I looked at the clock) Well it was close to 2:00 when he got home by that time I had all kinds of thoughts going on in my head. I couldn't stop crying everything I thought I was past came back even stronger. I hate being like this I was NEVER like this before I'm not trusting and having awfull thoughts in my head. I know this is normal but I feel like I don't even know who I am any more. H said he was sorry but he dropped off clothes at the thrift store and got gas and went shopping he swears that it took that long. I went nuts because how insensitive of him to not think I would be all upset. It showed me that he thinks our relationship is back to normal (hate that word)and we aren't close. Yes we are past the shock part of it but I still have a hard time with the whole thing. H says he loves me and he is very remorseful but I don't think he realizes that I have changed and I will never be that person again. I'm still angry and H wants to forget about it all (sounds so simple) NOT! I guess just when I feel like I'm making headway the demons come back and won't let me. TIME, Time please pass!!
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 903
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 903 |
I can totally relate....it's not easy and like you, I am changed and things will not be "normal" like it used to be...(it can eventually be better) but forget the word, "normal".
My husband is a cop. He stays at his Grandmother's two to three days out of the weeks when he works double or triple shift and extra details (to make ends meet). The trust issue will never be the same. Although Mr."T" has been good at calling and checking in etc....I too, 22 months into recovery...wonder if things will ever be "trustworthy" again.
I will have to keep trying until I'm either proven wrong or trust is restored.
Hang in there...things are still fresh for ya a bit...it takes time....
Saying a prayer for you and sending hugs,
Twiisty
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 2,342
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 2,342 |
lj1122,
You are on target for how long it takes to heal...I'm about at Twiisty's time frame and mentality.
I remember all too well counting the minutes and then getting out of control if H was a minute later than normal...ugly, but part of the process.
Wish I could speed it up for you sweetie!
love and prayers
Debi
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