Hello,

I found this article..hmmm..interesting..

http://www.innerself.com/Relationships/affair.htm

butterfly ,read the one I found. It is only focused on "two". No third party.

It even explains away a wondering eye.......

In some cases here, instead of a new Corvette, the H took on a younger woman, during mid life crisis. That is what happened to us.
In the article I found, I realized why he ran away from her so fast.....

Romantic love. Our love. Our life. His comfort and reality.....

Happens to a lot of couples in that stage of life.

Still doesn't help reduce any pain associated with A. Just an explaination.

Now if we only had the cash for the Corvette.....~sigh~ <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

love
Debi

I read the article and it has some good points, the pests and plants thriving in good soil......
What he doesn't mention or focus on is that there are some plants that won't thrive no matter what you do or where you plant them. Bad seeds, LOL.
I have one, his eyes are everywhere, he roams the internet, he is a hunter always was. Too late for me until it's over, but articles like that simplify the tragic reality of infidelity.

Hi,

sorry for reposting the same article Gem.

I just find it funny sometimes how these situations are made to seem so simple, when in fact it's such a complicated situation most especially when an oc is involved, I wish someone would do a piece on affairs, oc's on a talk show or something..well, I haven't watched Jerry Springer for sometime, maybe it's already been done..LOL. bet I'd be a candidate for a feature guest there..but seriously..you feel like this type of thing couldn't have happened to you, but the reality is there...

just yesterday after reading the article, I was doing my 'reflection' mode again and seeing things in hindsight..again.

<sigh>

butterfly and Crushinblo,
Yes the article seemed to simlify infidelity.

The one I read yesterday is different. Go read it.

When an oc is involved it takes a lot not to just leave the situation altogether. The "fog" lasts a little longer because of oc and the tremendous guilt that produces. It greatly hinders recovery.

Trying to include oc in your life is usually another blow to recovery. It's like making nice w/ the very real proof of the A and trying to act like it's ok. Usually followed by arguments as to how, where, and when you and H can do so.

For us it proved to be too hindering. We finally gave it up and just pay cs. H admitted long after we had tried that he saw nothing but grief for the years to come and that he wanted "us" more than anything else. He even bought me an angel holding a heart that says "THANKS".

Jerry Springer? Ha! I used to make fun of those people and for a time in my life I was one of em!

Bless you both.

love
Debi