My UW today said that she had obtained a picture of the OC and OM to put in the OC's bedroom. The OC is 4 weeks old. Why would she even state this? Am I expecting too much? I do not think I should even have to answer such a question. Under the protection rule, I do not think she should have even considered such a thing. When the OC is old enough and knows what is what and she wants a picture, that is a different story. Right now the OM will visit at mother inlaw house and will never see the babies room. I cant believe I was asked if this was OK? OK, I got it out. Thanks, Scott

Is your WW following the MB principles for marital recovery? If not, then you M is not really in the recovery phase. It is very, very thoughtless of her to beleive that putting a picture of the OM in OC bedroom is going to be fine and dandy with you. Your forgiveness of your WW, and acceptance of the OC in your heart and home, does not mean that you accept the OM in your live at all. It has been stated by Harley that recovery can never start until all contact with OP is terminated forever, and having a picture of the OM, prominently displayed in your household, is not only an insult to you but a huge obstacle for marital recovery.

i am in a similar situation. i have a child with om and i have completely cut all ties with him. my h and i are trying to work things out although it is a roller coaster everyday. i have a fear that the om is going to show up someday before we rebuild what we had. my h and i have talked about that and he knows that if the om came around it would be completely to try to see the child but it could cause problems. i don't care to see him at all but if it did happen and he ever asked me to put a picture of him in my childs room, out of respect for my h i would have to decline. Lord knows it must be hard enough for my h having our child be a constant reminder. i would not even take the picture from him and pretend that i was going to put it in the room. i don't understand why your w didn't just tell him no!!! i do agree that if the om is a part of their life when they are older than that would be completely different!!! hang in there and keep me posted cause maybe i could learn something from you all!!!

I can see why this was a sore spot with you and I am sure your wife was not thinking, we have a bleded family of corts and it is awkward and stressfull at times.
I know om's wife put a picture of me in my daughters room at there house, although I am sure it has long since come down. I have lots of pics of om and lots with he and daughter together, as we have all shared pics many times. but I dont have them out, they are kept put up, if my daughter ask for them, I give them to her to look at for a bit and then put them away, when she is old enough to care for them she may have them, but I would know way put them out. I odnt really want to look at them my self. But I wont say no if daughter ask, because I never ever say any thing bad about her father. Not healthy for the baby. I think your wife is still a little confused as to what she is doing... ignore it and dont respond, is what I would do, or just say, I dont feel that is healthy at this moment and not needed for the baby, she cant even focus on the pic just yet.