</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">1. Can you recommend a MC and or IC who fit the criteria of MB? Located in the city, any of the bigger suburbs, or the other cities nearby would be ok, I drive 30+ mins. most places I go anyway</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">My answer is "why use imitation, when the real thing is available?" 888-639-1639 for appointments for Steve or Jenn Harley. They're the best. As a second choice, you could do phone/email counseling with the MB-certified "cerri" (look at Just Found Out section for her). She's got a website
here. Michele Weiner-Davis (who has good ideas, is very pro-marriage, but IMO is not as complete as the Harley's) is in Woodstock, IL. She might be another alternative.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">2. Trying to avoid going to our attorney, as he is also a close friend of ours. However, should we seek the guidance of an atty., if not ours, just so we are prepared if the x-om shows up, or for any unforseen reasons? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I would not worry about this. If the OM wants rights to the child, it's legally within his grasp (I believe---this is for WI). But he needs to do the legwork to establish paternity (successfully sue you, get DNA testing done, etc). All that to establish the fact that he will be a part-time parent and have the opportunity to pay child support. There's nothing you can legally do to prevent this, and any legal options involved notifying the OM of the situation. So I would just let this lie. There are very few cases of women being sued for fraud, because they kept this "fact" from OM, and OM finds out later. I don't think these are common enough to cause you worry. I used an extremely well-known attorney in Milwaukee to investigate this---if you really feel a need to get his info, I will post it (and then remove it). For all your questions concerning this, I would suggest you do as our lawyer advise and not poke the hornet's nest.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">7. This is just out of curiosity. Do any extended family members and friends know of the origin of your OC? None of ours do, and am hoping that will help in not having to ever reveal the truth to our children, nor our OC, if that is the position we continue to take. Of course, an emergency situation would change all of that. I ask, because I brought up the Q of telling the OC in a recent post. I think someone mentioned they thought you and your W aren't planning to tell your OC either, but the poster wasn't sure.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Our extended families (parents, brothers, sisters) know the truth. Our children do not. I am a firm believer in truth, justice, and the American Way(TM)---but in fact, this needs to be a POJA-style decision, and my wife is not in favor of disclosing this info. I don't think telling my son the truth now (at 4.5 years) would be relevant---I don't think he's able to understand the issues. I don't really know when the right time would be. It's a very hard decision, and I try to weigh what the benefits would be for the kids to know this (there certainly are some), versus the harm that the information could do.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">1. Do you and your W have a fave frozen C flavor? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, I won't speak for my wife (I've been trained out of that, for the most part...), but she does like chocolatey things. My favorite ice cream flavor is ginger---we used to get it at a little shop in Maynard, MA---when we lived out east. It's hot, cool, and tasty all at the same time.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">2. Are you guys getting your Australian Cypress from K.M. Hardwoods? They have some beautiful stuff, but cannot recall if they have anything that exotic. We purchased our hardwoods from them, but we were under budget constraints when building years back so we went w/ the oak, it looks like oak, and wears like oak! I am really pleased w/ it though, as it is more natural then some you see, w/ all the dark knots in it, and it is beveled planks instead of just a plain, flat looking floor. Are you going to use the Swedish finish? Again, blank mind, I can't remember the name of it, (bona-kemi, or something like that?) but it's wonderful stuff!</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">We're looking to get our flooring from a company in southern Indiana---Pennington Hardwoods. My wife doesn't trust me to do it on my own, so we've been trying to line up a local installer. I'm in favor of using a natural finish (Bioshield, Hard Oil followed by a wax), because we have the kids and dog traffic, so I'd like something that will be reasonably durable AND easy to regenerate the finish. I've heard good things about the bona-kemi finish (other than putting it down requires OSHA hazardous cleanup suits <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ), but I'd still worry that we'd scratch it up, and then not be able to repair the finish. I miss my wood floors from MA---we had a house built in 1830, and the floors were all original (pine, oak) and terrific.
