For what it's worth......
I wanted to share this testimony I read about.
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A couple lived in the country w/ their children, the nearest home was HER parents and they could see it from thier house. I think the H built his family's home w/ the help of the FIL. They were Christians and were living a nice life.

The H got involved and had an A w/ another woman. He kicked out his wife and family and moved his new "honey" in. They broke up and he allowed his wife and family to move back in. Then he got involved w/ "honey" again! Kicked them out again!

I don't remember how many times this happened.

Needless to say, the wife was very hurt and angry. She prayed her heart out for wisdom and guidance. She lived w/ her parents during thier "separation", and from her parents kitchen window, she could see her home. She could see her H and OW living in HER home.

She prayed in earnest to God to know what she should do, she prayed to "see" her H through God's eyes. That started to change everything. She could see his brokeness and that he was not the man she had married, he was this poor, oppressed soul. More than turning his back on her, he had turned his back on God!

She continued steadfastly to pray for him, his soul and thier marraige. She never stopped loving him and did as much as he would allow her. I think I remember reading she would bring him dinner sometimes. He had gotten pretty "down on his luck", lost his job or something.

Well, it took 2 full years (if not more from what I remember) before he "came out of it" and began to "see the light".

They are happily married today.

I will try to find the site I read this on.

Hope this was worth something for you guys. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Thanks KT,

I needed to hear that there is hope.

Well today marks one whole year of the "prodigal's return." I am trying not to be depressed about this but I see no progress, if anything things seem to be worse. H was yapping his head off last nite when he came home, I didn't want to talk, that is why he did of course. I mentioned nothing about us & he didn't either. I thought of bringing up the letter I wrote him last week, but I thought what is the use.

I know my prayer too, should be to see my H through God's eyes, maybe then I would see brokenes, confusion, and true remorse. Through my eyes I only see selfishness, a lack of respect, consideration & caring, & no love. I really want to give up, I am so tired & it seems more & more the mind is clouded w/ thoughts of H & OW & the family he has created w/ her, but yet he doesn't want to live w/ her - WHY??????

I know God's time is not like ours, I should be waiting & patient a little longer I guess I just have no strength left.

Thanks again KT for giving something to think about, & thanks to you too Kris for reminding me that I should be living day to day without him & showing him that he is missing out on life w/ me.

I will try to stay encouraged.

The Update:

H overslept and didn't pick our son up from daycare on time--I didn't b**** a bit--didn't comment on it.

He had taken some of his headache medicine adn fallen asleep--battles those headaches ever since brain tumor--but I believe he causes them by all this stress and turmoil because they seem to lessen when he isn't all stressed.

He started to whine to me about headache when he dropped our son off and I said--I don't want to hear it--he looked shocked--I said you don't want me as your wife but you use me like one and I'm tired of it and tired of being concerned about you and getting nothing back in return--I said I give and give and get nothing except for what you gave me when you moved back home for 1 1/2 months and it has been almost a year since you didn't want to be married and then had A.

I just told him I don't have much to give back now--he said well maybe you should be done and I didn't even reply and acted very indifferent--he left shortly after that and I asked if he was still thinking things through and he said yes.

He left I ran to Home Depot and went and took care of my horse--had a missed call from him on my cell around 8:15pm--returned his call and he asked what was up and I said nothing that I'm just returning his call--of course he wanted to know what I was up to--told him-played it cool.
He had to be to work at 5:00am--earlier then normal and I know how hard a time he has getting up and I wondered how he was going to deal with this.

He askes if he can stay the night at the house and I said oh yes because you can't get up and you are afraid you will over sleep and he said yes.

I said that is fine--he got their at 10:15pm and said where so I sleep--I said I don't care and he said well you know me coming over tonight doesn't change anything and I said yes I know you just to be to work ontime and you don't care about me.

He eventually came to be and he actually got up okay on his own this morning so I'm not sure he really needed help getting up but used it as an excuse to come over--whatever.

That's the update

Albany

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I said I don't care and he said well you know me coming over tonight doesn't change anything and I said yes I know you just to be to work ontime and you don't care about me.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Albany,
How can you stand this kind of stuff. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> I know you love him but come on, sweetie I really think you need to do Plan B w/ him for real or at least stop him from running in & out of your house like that, he just wants to keep you from moving on, not saying that you have to but you can make him think you are, but not like this.

Isn't this hurting you when he comes by & says & does the things he does? Is it really your responsibility to play nurse maid & make sure he gets to work on time when he insists that he doesn't want you to be his wife much longer?
I know you are wanting to do whatever you need to in order to help him see the light but I don't think this is gonna help.